Purpose




Thoughts of a messed up Christian saved by God's grace





Wednesday, October 31, 2018

Boy erased, and being normal

 Wow, another blog post in a short time, and it makes two in two days. I guess I must have turned over some kind of leaf.

  This post is totally about gay related stuff, if you try to avoid reading these posts.... and shame on you if you do avoid reading them. Seriously.



Boy Erased

 There is a new movie coming out soon that I have seen and heard a lot about. It is based on a true story. Here is the plot:

Boy Erased is a 2018 American-Australian coming-of-age drama film based on Garrard Conley's 2016 memoir of the same name. ... The film stars Lucas Hedges, Nicole Kidman, Russell Crowe, and Edgerton, and follows the son of Baptist parents who is forced to take part in a gay conversion therapy program.

 There has been a lot of abuse and bad efforts over the years to try to turn gay people straight. There are stories of shock therapy, boys forced to watch heterosexual pornography, and other bizarre and cruel things done to try to force change.

 Conversion therapy is very controversial even among we who are same-sex attracted and living by what the Bible says. I do believe it works for some people, but I also believe that number is very few. If it is done, it should be 100% consensual, and with the warning that it may not work. I do not believe minors should be forced into it. Christian parents just need to deal with a gay child better.

 Is total change possible? Yes, of course it is. Why don't all of us experience that? I have absolutely no idea. There have been guys who have lived a very promiscuous gay life, become a Christian, and married a woman and made it work. Some claim to not have any attractions for other men anymore. Some are only attracted to the woman they married. Others, like me, are never attracted to women and may want to marry and live a "normal" life with a woman, but it just isn't going to happen.

 I am in several Facebook groups for people with same-sex attractions, and have found those helpful. There is one I am in where there have been a couple of posts by people promoting seeing the movie, and expressing looking forward to seeing it.

 This bothers me a lot - hence this blog post. I am no fan of conversion therapy, and would never try it. However, this movie is anti-change of any kind. It is promoting giving into your gay desires, and is going to paint in a bad light any ministry or people saying you should not give in and live the gay lifestyle.

 It is rough having these attractions. Rougher and more difficult than any "straight" person could ever imagine. Then add to it the general attitude of evangelical Christians towards gay people, and the attitude of gay people and liberals towards anyone like us who want to live for God instead of our sexual desires. Hint: they aren't too crazy about us.

 I fear this movie will bring out even more antagonism towards SSA Christians, and evangelical Christians. In fact, I am sure it will.....and yet we have SSA Christians looking forward to seeing it and thinking it sounds like a good movie.

 I feel for the boy that this happened to. I wish he had had parents who were not OK with his being gay, but didn't do to him what they did.



Normal sexuality

 Christopher Yuan related a story in his book Holy Sexuality that stuck with me. I may have touched on it in a blog post and/or in the book review, so if I repeat myself, I apologize.

 A woman came to him absolutely crushed because her gay son had just moved in with his boyfriend. She lamented and wished he was normal like her other son, who had a girlfriend and was pregnant with his child.

 But is that normal sexuality, to be having sex with a girl he is not married to, and getting her pregnant? Sure, it may be normal by the world's standards, but so is being gay and other sinful practices.

 There was a day when it wasn't considered normal or good for people of the opposite sex to have sex outside of marriage, and have a baby out of wedlock. The world normalized that eons ago, but it still isn't normal or good by God's Word.

 Think about it: this mother is crushed that her son is gay and having sex with another guy, but doesn't seem to be bothered at all that her other son is having sex with his girlfriend and has knocked her up.

 The church has gotten used to sex outside of marriage between men and women. It doesn't really bother the average Christian much, if at all. Yet those same Christians are still disgusted and horrified by 2 guys or 2 women having any kind of sexual relationship.

 Pardon me for being political for a minute: There are tons of evangelical Christians who are not bothered by Donald Trump's serial adultery, strip clubs, or his bragging about grabbing women by the genitals. Many will and have defended him, and say we shouldn't judge him.  How can these same people turn around and be horrified by gay people and condemn them? You cannot treat gay people like they are the worst of sinners and deserving hell, while winking at and defending immorality in your favorite politician.

 There needs to be a change in how evangelical Christians react to and treat gay people. No, the answer is not to go pro-gay theology like too many Christians and churches are doing. But they need to stop acting like homosexuality is the unpardonable sin, and that gay people are beyond hope and not deserving of any love or compassion.

 Normal sexuality is one man married to one woman for life. It isn't having sex outside of marriage, sex with another person other than your spouse, or even divorcing your spouse and marrying another. The Bible has two options for "normal" sexuality, or what Christopher Yuan calls holy sexuality: faithfulness in marriage, and chastity in singleness.

 The young guy having sex with his girlfriend is not practicing normal sexuality any more than the gay guy and his boyfriend. They are both sinning and twisting what God intended for sex to be: withi the bonds of marriage, one man and one woman.

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