No pie for me

   I got no pie today. Yeah, I know...... I have type 2 diabetes and shouldn't have much pie anyway, but still.....most of the adult males in my church was given either an apple, cherry, or blueberry pie as I sat there and watched them being given out.

  Today is Father's Day, a day that always brings an ache to me. Those pies were for all the fathers in attendance.... and no, I don't think single guys should get something being given out for Father's Day......that would be weird and would feel patronizing or like pity..... but that doesn't take the sting away. (Why isn't there an uncle's or single's day, by the way?!)

 Can I share one of my biggest hurts and regrets? It is never having the opportunity to be a dad. I would have loved to have been a father. I love kids, and the inability to never have my own has been a constant source of grief to me and I have cried more than a little at this void in my life.

  And yeah, the marriage thing would be nice, and I feel that void also...... but there is that little thing about not being attracted to women; and you really need to be attracted to a woman to marry her and make it work.

 So there is single-for-life me watching the other guys get pies. I sat there thinking about it, and something came to my mind. Maybe it was God speaking to me.....I don't think we give Him enough credit for the things that come to our minds. As I sat there feeling the sting of never being a father ad never getting recognition for being a father; I was reminded of the blessing that I do have of being an uncle.

  My relationship with my nieces and nephews is closer than the average uncle. Since I have no kids of my own, nor have friends to hang out with; I have poured more love and money into these six great kids than I would have if I had had my own. I still buy all six Christmas gifts, give them something for Valentine's Day with a card, and give them money for their birthdays.

 I have taken my nieces out to eat with me more times than I could count, and now that my nephews live so close to me I am taking them out. I even took all six kids out for pizza back before Christmas and loved it.

  The hugs, the "I love you's", being told I am the best uncle or most awesome uncle in the world.... those are things that mean the world to me. These six not-so-small-anymore kids have been such a blessing and a source of healing in my life that no one would ever understand or realize.

                             (my nieces and I at the top of the 193 foot tall Cape Hatteras Lighthouse)

 I went on vacation for a week to the Outer Banks last week with my parents, my one sister and her husband, and my three nieces. I knew the girls wanted me to go pretty badly, and that is one reason I went instead of going to the Hope for Wholeness Conference that I have attended the last two years..... and I am glad I did. My nieces told my sister they were glad I went and that they wish they could see me every day......that is better than getting a store bought pie any day. Having my 12 year old nephew texting me and telling me at the end that I am the most best uncle in the world.....that is better than any recognition a church could give me.

 Tomorrow is my second of two days off. I am going to Walmart to pick up a few things and am meeting my three nieces there. From there, we will go to Jalisco's, a Mexican restaurant we all enjoy. Uncle Mark will be paying and loving the opportunity to hang out with my three favorite girls, and I will be thankful that these two teenagers and one past her teens wants to hang out with their bachelor uncle...... and I will enjoy the great Mexican food.

  So the church can keep their pies. I have something far better than any pie or other item they could give out: I have six great kids who call me Uncle and who love me. That is definitely better than a pie.

 So as this Father's Day comes to a close, I will be thankful that though God did not work it out for me to have kids of my own, He gave me some great kids to love and be uncle to, which is almost as good as being a dad.

June random musings

Here we are over half way through another month, wondering where it has gone. I have been seriously deficient in blogging ideas lately, but have the itch to write, so the result is a "random post" of things floating around in my brain lately:

1) I wish I was still on vacation. Man, was it a good one.

2) I still firmly believe Hillary Clinton will destroy Donald Trump in an election..... and I am still #nevertrump. Oh, I am #neverhillary also, but I am convinced barring some miracle at the Republican Convention of Donald Trump getting tosses aside, we will have Hillary Clinton as our next president.

3) The majority of people coming into the Emergency Department are not emergencies.

4) A radical Muslim is to blame for the Orlando shooting.... not guns, not the NRA, and not Christians.

5) I am seriously considering un-registering as a Republican. Seriously. After this election, I don't want to identify as a Republican.

6) No one deserves to be shot and killed in cold blood, even people who are living a sinful lifestyle. It is just as wrong to celebrate those deaths as it is to promote that lifestyle.

7) It would seem Obama is more upset about the mention of radical Islam, than he is about the actual shooting and the deaths and injuries sustained.

8) There are better ways to deal with the death of a loved one than to knock down two hospital employees - giving one a few broken ribs -  and put your fist through a glass door. (yeah, that happened)

9) The same conservative media and talk show hosts who criticized the liberal media for not doing their job by truly vetting Obama, are the same ones not truly vetting Donald Trump.

10) Radical Islam is at war with us whether our pro-Muslim president will admit it or not.

11) Donald Trump is American Christians' favorite serial adulterer and strip club owner.

12) There is such a push on to make gay OK and to gloss over or twist what the Bible says about homosexuality.......yet God asks the same thing of everyone that he asks of we with same-sex attractions - forsake our sins, deny ourselves, and follow Him.

13) Jesus said the way is narrow..... how much of what we Christians do fits on that narrow way?

14) If a gun store or manufacturer can be held liable for a shooting, then beer sellers and manufacturers should also be held liable for damages and deaths related to the use of their products.

15) I don't believe minorities want equal rights. They want special rights.

16) If talking on your cell phone while driving is so dangerous, what about eating, drinking, having a dog walking all over you and the car while you're driving.........

17) There is more of a push on for kids to wear helmets while riding a bicycle than there is for peopel to wear one while riding a motorcycle......maybe because they figure motorcyclists are already brain damaged if they are riding such a dangerous thing.......

18) Happy Father's Day to God!

The narrow way

"The narrow way"

"Be in the world but not of it"

"Take up your cross and deny yourself"

"Marvel not that the world hates you"

    How does our modern Christianity line up with these statements from Jesus? Does the life we are living as Christians look like we are on the narrow way? Are we truly in the world but not of it? Are we really carrying a cross and denying ourselves?


Gay is OK.......

    A lady on a Christian Facebook page I am on was arguing that gay is OK for Christians. That is one of my biggest pet peeves, so I replied to her. She came back saying that we need to look at all Scripture and interpret it through culture. In other words, some of what is in the Bible was just meant for that culture, but doesn't apply to others. Whaaat?!


We don't need the Bible anymore

  We hardly need the Bible anymore. For some time now, people have demanded a chapter and verse for them to do or not do something as a Christian. Now we are beyond that. It can be in black and white in more than one chapter and verse, and people will reason around or twist Scripture so they can do what they want to do.

   I have wondered many times what my Christianity would look like without a church, pastor, books, culture,  or other Christians influencing my beliefs on what is wrong or isn't wrong. If all I had was the Bible and God, what would I believe? Would I be Arminian, or Calvinist? Would I think it was OK to watch movies like Fifty Shades of Grey, or would I believe that was wrong for me to do....would I even feel it was right to watch movies? How much skin would I believe it was OK to show? Would I still believe tattoos are something Christians shouldn't do, or would I have so many that I looked like a gang member?  How would I live and conduct myself in all areas of life if all I had to go on was what I read in the Bible and got from God?

Can we dress like Victoria's Secret or Abercrombie and Fitch models and be on the narrow road?

Can we watch Game of Thrones and be on the narrow road?

Can we dishonor the Sabbath and be on the narrow road?

Can we keep our faith to ourselves and be on the narrow road?



We are influenced more by everything and everyone than by God and His Word.

   Unfortunately, that is not a possibility for us today. Everything we believe about God, the Bible, what is right and wrong for us, and how to interpret Scripture is influenced by people and things outside of God and the Bible. If you have Amish parents, you are going to believe in extreme dress and living conditions to keep separate from the world. If you are raised by some  modern Christians, you'll be told you can go next to naked and do everything the world does. If you are raised Calvinist, you'll be a Calvinist. If you're raised Arminian, you'll believe that way.

  If you think about it, most of our beliefs and worldview comes from family, church, and other sources instead of from God and the Bible. We believe that is wrong because we were taught it. We believe a certain theology is right because our church and parents raised us to believe it. We all have the same Bible, but have differing beliefs and ideas that are often poles apart.



Extremes to the right or left are wrong and dangerous


  Extremes in anything is wrong. The Amish are one extreme, where they try to cut themselves off so much from the world that they call things wrong that God would never expect. Then there is the opposite extreme: go naked if you want (slight exaggeration), have sex outside of marriage and with the same gender, do everything the world does and pick and choose what parts of the Bible you want to observe or not..... and still claim to follow Jesus.

  We can debate and argue all we want, and no one agrees on everything.....but are we modern American Christians truly walking the narrow way, or are we on the broad road that leads to destruction?

  Take the gay issue: There are several verses in both the Old and New Testaments that say it is a sin, an abomination, and that anyone practicing that sin will go to an eternity in hell. There are more and more Christians saying those verses don't really mean that, and God is OK with homosexuality. Question: Is a man professing to be a Christian while having sex with other men on the narrow way? Is he being in the world but not of the world? Is he denying himself and carrying a cross? No, no, and no. You cannot ignore what the Bible says about this sin and practice it, and claim to be on the narrow way. You cannot be denying yourself and carrying a cross while living an immoral lifestyle that God condemns as sin.

  The gay issue is just the latest and most blatant twisting and/or ignoring of Scripture. We have taken God's Word and treated it like a bag of trail mix. I don't like raisins, so when I eat a bag of trail mix that has raisins in; I take the raisins out, That is how we have come to treat the Bible. We decide what we will obey and observe in  the Bible. Culture dictates what is OK, and we Christians follow along. If it is unfair to us, we ignore it. If it is inconvenient, we reason it away or twist Scripture.

  And yet God said if we obey Him, we will keep His commandments. How can we claim to love God and reason around His commandments and ignore or twist what His Word says is sin?

Warning: Personal stuff ahead.

  Having same-sex attractions isn't an easy thing to deal with, though I have gotten to a place in life with God's help and maturing that it isn't as big of a deal as it used to be....... but it is still difficult. It is not a light and easy cross to bear, and it is a daily denying myself. I'd like to marry. I'd like to have someone to love and love me in return. I get lonely and long for companionship, but I cannot serve God and put my own desires above Him and His Word.

  Is it fair? No. Is it convenient? No. But thanks to Eve eating the forbidden fruit and then using her female wiles on Adam to get him to eat it - my interpretation :-) - sin affects us all. From the teenage boy wondering why he is attracted to other guys instead of girls, to the young man born with no arms or legs, to the babies born with drug addictions because of a mother addicted to drugs....... and on and on. Life isn't fair thanks to sin.

  But that doesn't mean we can toss out what the Bible says on things we don't think are fair or inconvenient. That doesn't mean the Bible is wrong because it condemns as sin what we struggle with. That doesn't mean God will wink at our sin as we do what is contrary to His Word.

Can I live the way I am living and truly be on the narrow road?

  The idea among Christians today is "how much can I get away with doing and still make it to Heaven?" I may be cynical, but I have been there myself and I have seen and heard enough to know this is all too common.

 A better question may be: can I live how I am living, do the things I do, dress the way I dress, view what I view, use my time the way I do, talk the way I talk, etc....... and be on the narrow way?

  I have many Calvinist friends. I disagree with the doctrine, but have confidence in them...... but I fear this doctrine/theology has given some people the idea that they can do whatever they want and saunter into Heaven some day..... yet if we truly aren't denying ourselves and are not truly on the narrow way, the Bible plainly says we are on the broad way that leads to destruction......it won't matter what we professed and claim; if we aren't on the narrow way........it will mean destruction.

 I am 100% including myself in this when I say it: We are way too self-centered, and too many of us have decided what is right or wrong for us, and feel we have a right to do as we want. We spend our time the way we want on sports, reading, entertainment, and whatever makes us feel good. We dress how we want, even if it may cause our brother or sister to stumble......after all, it is our right. We spend our money on what we want.

How are we different?


 There are those who sacrifice everything to serve God. Many have lost their lives and have been tortured for serving God. Many have left everything to serve God...... and here we sit glued to our TVs cheering on the latest sports game, American Idol winner, and other shallow things that we are focused more on than God.

 And meanwhile a world is plunging to eternity while we do our best to live as close to the world as we possibly can get. As many plunge towards and eternity in hell, we pat them on the head and tell them they are fine the way they are......and we stroll down the broad way with them that leads to destruction.

  I want to honor God in all I do. I want to be on the narrow road and not the broad way that leads to destruction. I don't want to set down the cross I carry for an easier way, but I want to live a life that pleases God and I desire what He wants for me, not what I think is best,

Beach thoughts volume 2......drinking water at the beach

There's something about being at the ocean that brings one's mind to God and things of God. If you believe that God created this world and all that is in it, you cannot help but think of God as you view the majestic greatness of the ocean.

  I don't swim. In fact,  I can't swim. When I am at the ocean, I walk in the sand, walk in the surf, sit or stand and gaze at the massive body of water in front of me. As I sat in my beach chair yesterday afternoon at the beach, my oldest niece passed out bottles of water. I needed it. I was very warm, sweating profusely, and was in need of hydration. As I sipped my somewhat cool water, my eyes roamed the vast expanse of water that was in front of me. The irony did not escape me. Here was an unlimited amount of water in front of me, and I was drinking from a bottle of water we had brought with us.

  I've never drank ocean water. I don't think I have even ever tasted it by accident. I just know that ocean water is no good. It is salt water, and would never quench my thirst. In fact, it would make it worse, and would harm me if I drank too much of it.

 My thoughts went - or were directed to - the story of the Samaritan woman in the Bible. Jesus referred to what He had to offer as "living water". As I thought about ocean water and living water, these thoughts came to me:

1) Just as the ocean water would never satisfy our thirst, the things of this world never will either, Whether it be entertainment, sex, food, or whatever else we try to fill our time and lives with; it will never satisfy the thirst within us.Only Jesus can do that.

2) A little of the ocean won't hurt us, and likewise a little of some of the things the world offers won't hurt us. Not all entertainment is bad. Sex within marriage is good and fine. We need food to survive.....yet too much of even good things can be bad for us. Too much food makes you overweight and at risk for health problems and even death. Too much entertainment will drain you spiritually and influence your beliefs and even your health. Too much sex...... well, I won't go there.

  I have said it before, and it bears repeating: so many of we modern day American Christians are so shallow, and I have to wonder if this is one reason why....we are trying to quench our thirst with the wrong things. Instead of diving headfirst into the water Jesus offers, we sip at it and dive into the water that the world gives....salty ocean water. Only the water Jesus offers can satisfy,.

Beach thoughts

   I have never blogged while on vacation before. I blogged while on my overnight trip to Amish country in February, and blogged while at the Hope for Wholeness Conference; but this is the first time since getting a laptop that I have been on a true vacation.

  I haven't been to the ocean for 5 years. In some ways, my life hasn't changed much in those 5 years. In other ways, my life has changed. I have matured some.......believe it or not.... I have grown spiritually, and now believe the God who created this world loves me more than I could ever grasp or imagine.

  This morning was my first time at the beach/ocean since 2011. I walked in the sand and sat in my chair and watched and listened to the waves crashing on the shore. As I walked, sat, and stood looking at the ocean and beach, these thoughts came to my mind:


Footprints on the sand

  I have always liked the Footprints In The Sand Poem. As I looked back and saw my footprints in the sand of Avon Beach, I snapped a picture and the words of that poem came to my mind:

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed He was walking along the beach with the LORD. Across the sky flashed scenes from His life. For each scene He noticed two sets of footprints in the sand. One belonging to Him and the other to the LORD.

When the last scene of His life flashed before Him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of His life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times of His life.

This really bothered Him and He questioned the LORD about it. LORD you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life there is only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me.

The LORD replied, my precious, precious child, I Love you and I would never leave you! During your times of trial and suffering when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.

  And on a not-so-serious note, this little strip also came to mind:

The Love of God, verse 3

  As I watched the waves crashing on the shore, and looked out to see water as far as my eyes could see, the words of the third verse of The Love of God came to my mind:

Could we with ink the ocean fill,

And were the skies of parchment made,
Were every stalk on earth a quill,
And every man a scribe by trade,
To write the love of God above,
Would drain the ocean dry.
Nor could the scroll contain the whole,
Though stretched from sky to sky.

Refrain

O love of God, how rich and pure!
How measureless and strong!
It shall forevermore endure
The saints’ and angels’ song.


Holes in the sand

  This is a bit long, but it is really good. This also came to my mind as I walked on the beach this morning. I guess God figured I needed all of these reminders:

From Ann Graham Lotz

Only God, through Christ, has the power to forgive sin. It doesn’t matter how big the sin is or how small, it doesn’t matter how long ago it was committed or how recently. It doesn’t matter whether it was spontaneous or malicious. God will forgive you if you come to Him at the cross of Jesus Christ.

God forgave the men who nailed His Son to the cross—when they asked Him to.2 So why do you think He won’t forgive you when you ask? What do you think is beyond the forgiveness of God? Abortion?—Adultery?—Abuse?—Hate?—Hypocrisy?—Doubt? —Divorce?—Drunken-ness?—Or Immorality?—Or Murder?—Or _____________? You fill in the blank.

There is nothing you have ever done that He cannot or will not forgive when He is humbly asked.

A few years ago I found myself groping for a way to explain this to a woman who had been on death row for multiple murders and would be executed within ten hours of my visit. Tears glistened in her eyes as she looked at me beseechingly, needing assurance of the salvation she had claimed by faith six years earlier. That very night she would be stepping into eternity, and she was desperate for reassurance of her forgiveness by God. I asked her if she had ever been to the ocean, and she nodded “yes.” I asked her if, as she had walked along the shore, she had seen small holes in the sand where ghost crabs had darted in and out. Again she nodded. I then asked if she had seen any larger holes, like those made by children digging. Beginning to look puzzled, she said “yes,” she had seen holes like that. I persisted gently to see if she had ever seen huge holes created by machines dredging a channel or burying pipe lines on the beach. Her brow furrowed as she again acknowledged a quiet “yes.” I then leaned toward her and pressed my point, “Velma, when the tide comes in, what happens to all those holes?”

A soft light began to gleam in her eyes, and a smile played at the corner of her lips as I answered my own question. “All the holes are covered equally by the water, aren’t they? God’s forgiveness is like the tide that washes over all the ‘holes’ of your sins and covers all your sins equally.” And Velma stepped into her heavenly home fully assured of her acceptance by God.

Praise God for the sacrifice of Jesus that is sufficient to cover all of your sins. All of them! Even “small” sins like gossip or worry, “medium-size” sins like losing your temper, “large” sins like murder—all are covered equally by the blood of Jesus.



There is nothing you have ever done that He cannot or will not forgive when He is humbly asked.

And one more:

Waves on the beach

   As I walked on the beach this morning, much of the sand was undisturbed....yet I know we were not the first people to walk on this beach. At high tide, the water comes up more on the beach and wipes away all of the footprints, tire tracks, and other marks in the sand. I could see it already happening where my nieces had walked closer to the water than I had.

  I was reminded that each day is a new day with no mistakes or screw ups yet, just like the beach is wiped clean daily of footprints. And it is also like God's grace and forgiveness sweeping across our souls and hearts to make them unblemished and free from sin.

Did the church fail Trey Pearson?

  **Warning, this is going to be one of those personal posts with possibly uncomfortable topics.

   Yesterday I blogged about Trey Pearsons' coming out as gay. He is the member of a  "Christian alternative rock band" who has struggled with same-sex attractions all of his life and now has decided to leave his wife and pursue life as an openly gay man.

  I find this extremely sad. According to the Bible I read, there is no way he can make it to Heaven living that kind of life, and it is also sad he is breaking his marriage vows and also heading into a life that is dangerous health-wise and in other ways.


It isn't easy......

    As I have thought about the choice this man is making, I have to wonder if the church failed him. He was raised by conservative parents and raised in the church. Like me, he evidently was scared to confide in anyone and had to hide his feelings for years. Let me assure you as one who has been there, that is tough. You have to wear a mask and worry about keeping it firmly in place. You are one person to everyone else, but an entirely different person to yourself. The burden of carrying such a secret is very heavy and weighs on you in a way not many people could understand or relate to.

  There is pressure to date so as to appear normal, and pressure to marry to further this facade of normalcy of a heterosexual red-blooded male. Family wouldn't understand. Friends wouldn't understand and would most likely ditch you. You'd most likely be ostracized, judged, and avoided like the plague from the family of God you attend church with.

  So you become a master of disguise. The secret eats away at you like a cancer. You wonder what you did to deserve this, and how a loving God could sentence you to a life with no one to love..... if you do as you know you should and forsake your attractions and desires to serve God. Discouragement and depression are constant companions. You cry yourself to sleep more often than you can count. You look at other guys with their girlfriend or wife by their side and feel a pain that is almost physical. You want someone to love, but for you that would be sin and something you can never have unless God performs a miracle and "turns you straight".

  It is a heavy, heavy cross to carry; and I doubt I could put into words the anguish you can feel dealing with this issue; especially if you are in the church and know and believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that to give in is definitely sin and displeasing to God.

 And then if you feel you must keep it a secret, that makes it a thousand times worse.

  There are Christians and churches that are going too far on the love side of this issue. They twist, reason around, or just toss out what the Bible says about homosexuality and 100% completely affirm gay people as Christians. They claim to do it out of love, never realizing - or choosing not to - that they are helping these people towards an eternity in hell along with a very dangerous lifestyle.

 We evangelical Christians who still believe the Bible does condemn homosexuality, cringe and shrink in horror of the very idea of affirming "gay Christians" in their sin.

  But what if we are doing as much damage as these gay affirming Christians and churches?


What if?

  What if Trey Pearsons had grown up in a church where this issue was lovingly addressed, and people were encouraged to talk about it if they dealt with it? What if he had known if he came forward with his struggle that he would be met with love and Christian brothers and sisters willing to do whatever they could to help him? No, I am not talking about encouraging him to pursue his desires/attractions. I am talking about Christian love that doesn't shrink from a confession of a struggle like that, but instead loves that person and commits to helping him on his Christian journey, even if it means inconvenience or discomfort on their part, I am talking about being the family of God to people dealing with this very tough struggle.

 Gay affirming Churches and Christians go too heavy on the love, but we others tend to go too heavy on truth.

  The  heavy love side says we will accept you and you can go to Heaven while living as a gay person. The Bible doesn't really say it is a sin.

  The heavy truth side says you are a freak and abomination that is headed for hell. Your sin is worse than any other, and we don't want to be around you.

  And then there are those who breed hate against gay people and give all Christians a bad name.

We need a balance of truth and love

  The balance of the two says, yes it is a sin to give into your attractions and desires, but we love you no matter what. You cannot live for God and give into those attractions/desires, but we will walk beside you and do all we can to help you on your walk with God.

  If Trey Pearsons had been in a church that had that balance, would he be coming out as gay and walking out on his marriage today? I can't say for sure, but I do believe the likelihood would be cut way down if that had been the case. I know it would have made a big difference in my life if I could have come forward years ago and told what I was dealing with and got support and love, instead of feeling I had to hide it and deal with it on my own.

  And it isn't an easy thing for people to hear. "I am gay, I am attracted to other guys", or however else it is said.


You know someone dealing with it

  This is an issue that isn't going away. No matter who you are, you know someone dealing with this issue. They may hide it so well that no one, even their best friend and family has a clue..... but you know someone. It could be your sibling, parent, spouse, cousin, best friend....even your pastor.... broken people dealing with something bigger than them and scared to death to tell anyone.

  Some manage to marry and hide it for the rest of their lives, even from their spouse. Others stay single and make up excuses why they aren't dating or married. Others live a life of one night stands and anonymous hook-ups with others of the same sex. Others give up on God and the church and plunge headfirst into living the gay lifestyle out and proud. And sadly some, like Trey Pearson, decide to attempt both: God and the gay life.

 What if Trey Pearson was your son, your brother, your friend? Would you encourage him to pursue a dangerous lifestyle and one that will most likely end with an eternity in hell? Would you wash your hands of him and have nothing to do with him? Or would you love him, pray for him, and do all you could to bring him back to God?


Every church and family has a Trey Pearson

  Our lives and churches all have Trey Pearsons. We need to stop acting like this is the worse sin and issue, and yes.... fight the gay agenda and the insanity from the liberals - but don't forget to love and try to be there for those who deal with this issue while we do so. It is a very heavy cross to carry, and we may be chasing away those we should be helping to carry it.

 And that is something we all must do. To truly love and serve God, we must die to ourselves and our desires; whether they be sexually related or other desires. We all must pick up a cross and follow Jesus, and it isn't always easy, no matter who you are or what you deal with. People attracted to the same sex are not the only people guilty of choosing their own desires over what God wants and says.....the church is full of people doing the same thing, it just isn't always as obvious or looked down on.

 "Take up your cross, deny yourself, and follow Me"..... a command for all of us.

The tragic tale of Trey Pearsons

  Posts like this aren't popular. The pro-gay people don't like them because it is against what they believe. People who still believe the Bible truly does say it is a sin don't like it because they just don't want to think about it.

   Before yesterday, I had never heard of Trey Pearson. He is part of a "Christian alternative rock band" called Everyday Sunday. (What does the alternative mean anyway??). I also had never heard of the band. This 35 year old married father of 2 came out as gay. From everything I have read, it appears he is going to leave his wife,  and "co-parent" with her, and pursue his sexual desires.

  I was reading a lot of comments on the story, and sadly the majority of people were cheering him on and thinking it was a good thing. One person said he could better minister to the LGBT community. That is like someone claiming to be a Christian drug addict and saying he could better minister to drug addicts.

A definition

  In an attempt to avoid confusion, I am going to use the term "gay" to refer to someone who is engaging in sex or a sexual relationship with the same sex/gender. I myself deal with same-sex attraction, but do not attach the label "gay" to myself, for to me it is an identity and indicates sexual activities with the same gender. I know of Christians who identify as "celibate gay Christians", but to me that is like saying someone is a teetotaler alcoholic, or a celibate adulterer. To me, and for this blog post; "gay Christian" means someone professing to be a Christian while having sexual relations with the same gender.

A blessing and a curse

  The growing acceptance of gay people/homosexuality is both a blessing and a curse. As I well can testify, it is rough having to hide the fact that you are attracted to the wrong gender. Add to that the lies you must tell for why you aren't dating or married, and it is truly rough. Sitting in the church pew for years with a secret struggle, not being able to ask for prayer because it would get you ostracized or worse.

  So for me and others like me who want to live for God and not surrender to these attractions and desires, it is a blessing that there is growing acceptance. I don't feel the need to hide anymore, and bringing my struggles to light have actually taken their power over me away, and they have lessened to an immense degree.

 However, there is the curse. With the growing acceptance, more and more people are coming out as gay to openly live the gay lifestyle. Guys like Trey Pearson have swallowed the lie that you can be gay and Christian, so they are professing to know Jesus as Savior, but are engaging in sin and immorality....and getting approval and applause for doing so....sadly from many Christians.

 And here is why I find this news about Trey Pearson so tragic: I have studied and read many books about this issue. I have heard testimonies of men and women who lived the gay lifestyle, but left it to serve God. I have read and heard the arguments of the pro-gay theology crowd; and more importantly I have prayed a lot. And this is what I have found to be true and what I believe:

What I believe according to the Bible

1) Attraction to the same sex is not sin.

2) I don't believe people are born gay, but neither do I believe it is a choice.

3) The Bible clearly condemns homosexuality  (the sexual act) as sin in both the Old and New Testaments.

4) You cannot be a Christian and engage in sexual acts with the same gender. (Or the opposite gender for that matter outside of marriage).

5) God ordained marriage between one man and one woman, and any time marriage is mentioned in the Bible it is in that context.

6) You cannot live a life of habitual sin and go to Heaven, thus anyone who is having sex with the same gender will go to hell..... and that IS Biblical.

7) Anyone affirming and accepting a "gay Christian" is only helping them be deceived and helping them towards an eternity in hell.

8) Homosexuality is a form of brokenness. You don't just accept brokenness, you seek help and healing from it.

9) The gay life is a dangerous life. Gay men have a much higher rate of promiscuity - it is not unusual for a gay man to have hundreds and even a thousand for more sexual partners in his lifetime. AIDS and other STDSs are much more common among gay men than heterosexuals.

  Lasting monogamous relationships are rare among gay men. Their relationships tend to be short and even higher in frequency than heterosexuals. There also seems to be more depraved sexual acts among gay people, and the one sexual act common among gay men is dangerous health-wise.......so taking this all into consideration, how can any one say they love a person and encourage them to pursue that kind of lifestyle?

10) The gay lifestyle cannot make one happy.

11) There is freedom and deliverance. Yes, one may have the attractions and desires for life, but that happens with others. Heterosexual males may struggle with lust for life, porn addicts may always be tempted, former alcoholics may always have the desire to drink..... but God can keep us from going back to those sins. Some men get to a point their same-sex attractions are gone and they marry women. Others still deal with it but marry a woman and make it work, while others never get to that point.

 Regardless of the case, we need to get past the thinking that because God doesn't take away the attractions and desires, that it means He is OK with the sin,

  The Bible warns about God turning us over to believe a lie, and that has to be where these guys like Trey Pearson are. I am not hating him, nor throwing stones. I think it is sad, and I am thankful that it isn't me going against God and His Word, while claiming to be a Christian. We should pray for the Trey Pearsons of the world. Don't hate and judge them, but pray they see the truth and find their way back to God.... and never, ever affirm them in their sin and deception.