The quarantine edition

  Starting another muti-subject post that I'll likely work on over a period of a few days to a week. Or longer. :)

 And yes, there is some politics. :)

1) Corona

  I may have said this before, but I seriously thought it was a joke something to do with the beer when I first heard of the virus.

 Sadly, it is not. And man, have our lives changed in such a short time. My life really wasn't affected seriously recently. I got a call two weeks ago informing me that I was getting laid off for 3 weeks. Unless things change, I am off til May 4. As long as the unemployment checks come through, I am OK with it. I need a break. Unfortunately, there is nowhere to go.

  I do miss eating in a restaurant, can't take the nieces or nephews out to eat anywhere, and I'd really, really like to go thrift store shopping.

But as I have stated before, I am rarely around people outside of work and church and family times.....so the social aspect really isn't affecting me.

 It is a plus that I can stay up late and sleep in. :)


This all does bring up interesting questions:

Is this all really necessary? I get it that it is different than the flu......but all this?

Should the government have this much control...but yet if we go about as normal, it could spread like wild fire.

Should governors have the authority to demand all that they have without it having to go through anyone else? (I asked that on Facebook, and it turned into a Trump praisefest)

Man, do I miss normal.

2) Love

 I know my Bible fairly well. I am not saying I am a Bible scholar.....but I attended a Christian school for 13 years, was in a Christian home after the age of 11 1/2, attended a Bible college for 4 years, have read the Bible through once, and read many passages and studied books and passages of the Bible for the greater part of my life.

 So I can safely say that the main message of the Bible is love, mostly God's love for human kind. But the Bible also has a lot to say about loving others.....even Bible versions outside of what Jesus, Moses, and Paul used. (Everyone knows they used the KJV!)

 Can Christians say suck? I don't know. But if so, a lot of Christians really suck at loving people. It is easy to love people who are like us, and act like we want them to.

 Babies? Everyone loves babies....except Planned Parenthood and anyone who supports the murder of them.
Family members? With the exception that one aunt or cousin, usually we can love most of them.
Republicans? As long as they support and defend our politician to the death.
Democrats? Nah, they are evil and we can hate them.
Gay people? They are "perverts and should be hung". (Something someone in church leaned up and told me once, not having a clue about me.)

  I truly have learned a lot these last 4 years. We cannot love people the way God commands us to do, and argue politics and say the things all sides have said about those we disagree with politically. True story, as the saying goes.

 I John 4:8 says that if we do not love, we don't love God.....for God is love. (My paraphrase). If we can't love those who don't vote like us and who do not support our political candidate or political views, then we don't truly know God. If we can't love the gay couple next door, then we don't know God.

  I am so thankful for my 6 nieces and nephews: Stephanie, Allie, Caitie, Josiah, Ben, and Nathan. I am thankful for all of my family, and love them all.....but to be honest, I have spent a big part of my life feeling unlovable and unlikeable. (well, that evidently is not a word since it got highlighted....) I wanted so badly to be a father to a couple little boys - don't know why I never pictured being a father to girls. (It may because I wanted a brother so badly). When my sister Vicki was pregnant with Stephanie, my oldest niece, I vowed if it was a girl that I would have nothing to do with her. That of course changed once I set eyes on her, and she was followed by 2 other nieces who wrapped me around their fingers.

 Then the boys came after my other sister married. Vicki could evidently not have boys, and my sister Pam could not have girls. These 6 totally awesome kids have filled a hole in my life and heart, and I don't think I could love them more if I was their father. They love me, want to spend time with me...especially if I buy lunch....and are quick and willing to hug. Well, at least before Corona..... Even Josiah, age 18, hugs me and tells me he loves me.

 We all need love, but we don't all give it to all willingly and easily. I think I can rightly say we are most like God when we love, especially sacrificially and not holding back. Can we do that and be very political?

 I see posts all the time slamming people who do not support a certain politician. And do I love him? No, but unless you love Pelosi, Obama, Hillary, etc...don't judge me on not loving politicians.....yet, if the Bible is right, then we should love those very corrupt individuals who seem intent on destroying our rights and freedoms.

 And that underscores my point. There are few among us who truly loves like God commands us to. But are we willing to change? Does it matter enough to us?

3) Politicians and salvation

  It is really easy for those who support a politician to believe that the politician is a Christian. A lot, maybe most, of those who ran for president in the last several elections have claimed to be a Christian. Even pulling off a sudden conversion at the last minute when the Christian vote is needed is believed if one supports that candidate.

 Sadly, all a politician has to do is say he or she supports the political views and values of their supporters, and the supporters will staunchly defend their claim to be a Christian.

 For building a wall, stronger borders, being pro-life, putting down the other party, etc....the person HAS to be a Christian.

 Yet the Bible gives different criteria for being a Christian. You won't find the Democratic or Republican platform as being proof of Christianity in the Bible. The Bible says we are known by our fruits, and those have nothing to do with politics.

 The Bible states that it is really difficult for rich people to enter the Kingdom of Heaven. I would say it is pretty difficult for a politician to also, but then a lot of them are also rich.

4) Truly pro-life

 I read a comment on a Facebook post that bothered me a lot. A huge Trump supporter friend of mine commented that sadly this quarantine will probably result in a surge of abortions - the idea is couples cooped up together....well, you get the point. His statement may or may not be correct, but it was what a female friend of his posted in reply: "Or worse, more liberal babies."

 Think about that statement for a minute. This is a Trump supporter, and I assume a Christian,  saying having liberal babies being born is worse than babies being killed in the womb. If we are truly pro-life, we will be against the killing of all babies, no matter who their parents are or what their political party is. This woman cannot be pro-life with her wacked out statement. (evidently wacked isn't a word either)

 I am afraid we pro-life people drop the ball in other areas. Being pro-life isn't just being anti-abortion. It is caring about all people and their lives.

 And no, a president who is truly pro-life will NOT sign a bill funding the killing of babies.

5) Truth

When Jesus was before Pilate, He was asked by Pilate "What is truth?"

 Maybe that is a question that needs asked today also. What is truth? A young man I am friends with on Facebook, named Kenny Stetler, shared this recently:

The amount of rumors, conspiracy theories, poor reasoning, and outright falsehoods being shared on Facebook right now is astounding.

COVID, Bill Gates, vaccines, 5G, Fauci, microchips... No molehill is overlooked for potential promotion to mountain.

As people who, in theory, believe in an objective, knowable truth, I see disappointingly little time and thought given to searching for the truth. People who would die before they told a lie, share them day in and out with hardly a thought given to their credibility.

We have given in to the fatal conceit that if it sounds good to us, it must be true - after all, our motive is pure! Yet while motive is important, a lie that is told with the best of intentions is still a lie.

I know the world is confusing. I know that, in the din of voices that constantly barrage us, truth isn't always easy to find - I struggle with that. But I find, when that happens, it is always best for me to turn my thoughts to the things I know for certain.

"Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things." Philippians 4:8

  Well said. I have been both alarmed and disgusted at how little Christians seem to care about what is true today. Oh, almost any Christian worth their salt would say they never lie and are honest......but is that really the truth?

 I noticed it before the virus came along. If something makes a Christian's favorite politician look good, they will share the daylights out of it and never seem to care if it is true. If something makes a politician look bad they don't like, the same thing happens. Christians do post things on social media that are not true, and when confronted, all too often they just dig in their heels and defend the lie.

 It happened to me a lot during the 2016 election. Christians said all kinds of things to me since I dared oppose the GOP nominee and hold him to the same standards we used to hold politicians to. Then I went further and voted third party. Did you know it is possible to not vote Republican or Democrat? Wow. Who knew?! There ARE other choices, and you'd think a true Christian would understand that and show some grace. Ah, if only.

  Does truth matter? Do words matter? Is it honest and Christian to say "If you don't support Trump, then you are for Hillary." (That one almost amuses me.....the man himself supported her, and they didn't care about that..) Or "A 3rd party vote is for Hillary." Huh?

 Those were two of the most common, but there were others. Now since I am bored, let's take some time to examine these two statements:

Is it true that if you did not support Trump, you supported Hillary? No. I was against Hillary when Trump was giving her money and saying she'd make a great president. Being against him didn't suddenly change that......and I would wager most, if not all, of the Christians who said that to me knew that I wasn't for Hillary. It was most likely an attempt to guilt me into or somehow coerce me into voting the way they wanted....which isn't very Christian either. So to be blunt, these people are liars. You can excuse it or call it whatever you want, but they knew it wasn't true and still said it.

Is it true that a vote for a 3rd party was a vote for Hillary? Imagine for a moment that you ask me where I want to eat: Josie's Pizza or Denny's. Josie's Pizza is nasty, and I had bad experieces more than once at Dennys......I don't want to eat at either place. But I like O 'Charley's a lot, so I say I want to eat at O 'Charley's, and I eat there. But you wanted me to eat at Denny's, so you go around saying I ate at Josie's. That seems ludicrous, but no more so than saying since I didn't vote for Trump like they wanted me to, and voted 3rd party, then I actually voted for Hillary. It isn't true, and no Christian who actually cares about being honest would ever say such a thing. If you are reading this, can you understand why I have been so frustrated by this version of Christianity that has been corrupted and poisoned by politics?

   There are people who don't believe in wearing shorts, sleeves of certain lengths, watching movies or TV, and other things...yet will be dishonest when it comes to politics, or act very un-Christ-like in  how they treat people who dare speak out against a politician they have given too high of a place in their lives. I don't even believe it is Christian to freely voice your political views for and against who you want, yet try to shut down people who dare criticize the one(s) you like. Could politics be an idol? Can a politician be an idol? If they influence Christians to lie, or at best be less than honest, then yes.

***Addition to this post: There is a video of Trump suggesting people ingest disinfectant to fight the virus. As much as I dislike him, I didn't believe it til I watched the video. And yeah, he said it....yet many of his supporters are flooding social media with claims that he did not say that. One friend posted a link on my Facebook page claiming he didn't say it. I went and watched the video again before I replied, but she took it down in the meantime. I am guessing she realized she was wrong.


6) Corona 2

  I hope by the time that this quarantine has been lifted, that we will appreciate and be thankful for the every day normalcy and what we have that this virus has interrupted and kept us from. I hope that we will not take things for granted that we cannot do right now. Things like sitting in church, eating inside a restaurant, shopping at "non-essential stores", hugging those who are OK with it if we do that, having a job to go to.....and other things that we took for granted and cannot do right now....though if enough people started running around naked, they might open thrift and clothing stores. :)

  There are posts on social media asking what is one of the first things you will do after things go back to normal. One of the first things I am going to do is take my 3 nieces out to our favorite Mexican restaurant, and my 3 nephews to the restaurant of their choice. I am tempted on a warm enough day to meet my nieces at the Mexican restaurant, set up my card table in the parking lot, and eat there. :)


7) The nephews

 Speaking of my nephews, they and  my sister and brother in law moved Friday from Canton to the farm house I used to live in. They are buying it from his dad, so now they are a lot closer - from about an hour to about 10 minutes. I love it that they will be so close. I told Nate, the youngest at 13, that now they can take me out to eat. He gave me a look, and informed me that I am supposed to take them out to eat. :)

 I did my uncle duties last week. I dropped off cookies to my little sister and her family who we just moved the Friday before into the farmhouse I moved out of in August......so they are about 10 minutes from me now instead of an hour. (Yay!)

The two younger boys were't home, so I took the oldest one to get subs for him, my sister, and I. Then the other two got home, and the 3 boys wanted me to run them to Walmart. I figured why not, so we headed for Salem, going through Arby's drive through where I ordered the youngest two lunch - they were cheap though. Then we hit Walmart, which was not busy at all. The boys recently got a tent, and were wanting camping stuff. They handed me their stuff and cash, and asked if I'd pay for it. I learned long ago when they do this, that they most likely do not have enough money to cover it and are hoping I will cover the extra....which was $6.50. They did offer to pay me back later, but I told them not to worry about it. But man, them moving close might bankrupt me :)

 Then I went through the Wendy's drive through and got Frosty's for them. And me :)

 More recently, I spent a few hours entertaining the youngest 2 nephews by playing the Wii with them and getting a pizza.

 And yeah, social distancing, stay home, blah, blah, blah.... we were together to move, and I have only been around family....so not too worried at this point.

 And give me a break...I live by myself, and don't even have work now for 3 weeks.

8) Quarantine stuff 

   As I have stated before, I don't really have much human contact on my days off.....but this many days like that is driving me crazy.

 I have read. A lot. I have also worked on straightening and organizing things like under my sinks, my bookshelves upstairs, drawers, cupboards, etc. Next up is either my spare bedroom closet and the totes in my basement. I figure if it is in the totes, I most likely don't need all of it that badly.

 I have also been cooking more than normal. Which means I am eating too much. Ugh. My dumpster was a lot fuller than normal tonight when I put it out.

9) Would we be better off with Biden?

   No, I am not saying I want Biden for a president. I am against any liberal being president, which includes the one we have now.

 I wish I had kept track of all the things Trump has done and said that conservatives would have criticized and fought against if it were a president with a "D" by their name. There have been a lot. But I do remember the biggie: gun control.

Trump banned bump stocks.
He has pushed red flag laws with no due process
He has pushed raising the age to buy guns to 21.
After the one shooting, he said we need more gun control measures to stop shootings.

 And he may have even done more than that. I remember when Obama even mentioned gun control. Conservatives went nuts, including this conservative. I remember when Obama pushed gun control after a shooting, and conservatives and fake conservatives like Hannity and Limbaugh talked about him crawling on top of the bodies to push gun control. Yet when Trump does that....and does actual gin control....the same people are silent. For some reason, his supporters will not criticize him no matter what he does and says......even when it is things they would scream about and march if he had a D by his name.

 I have watched these last 4 years at the actions, words, and policies of this man that should have been fought and criticized.....but one cannot criticize this man, so his supporters either ignored, defended, or said "but Hillary". It is like a huge case of Stockholm syndrome. (Look it up).

 Another example: Imagine if Hillary or Obama called we conservatives "human scum." Do you think it would be ignored? No. Hannity and Limbaugh would be all over it, and my fellow conservatives would be ranting about it on social media. Yet Trump said that about we #nevertrump conservatives, and not one relative or friend of mine has criticized him for it. They ignored it like his gun control, his paying off a prostitute, his horrible actions, vulgarity, and more. Their silence bothers me more than him saying it. I am tempted to ask them what they think of it, but fear they would just prove they are more loyal to and protective of him than me. So I won't. And worse, they may agree with him.

  By the way, I brought up Trump's gun control to the same coworker who said she doesn't need friends who won't support Trump. She asked if his gun control directly affected me, and then asked why I cared.....wow. Imagine her defending it if it was Obama.

 But back to my premise: If Joe Biden was president instead of Trump, all conservatives would fight him on gun control. All conservatives would be outraged if he called us things like human scum. All conservatives would fight bad policies, actions, and words. All conservatives would fight him as he funds abortion.

 There are so many reasons I get angered and frustrated by this presidency and his supporters....and this is one reason. The man can get by with anything, and his supporters will not question him. I honestly believe many Christians are more comfortable and quick to question God than Trump, and will take criticisms of God over criticisms of Trump. A friend of mine who shall remain nameless has said Trump could kill children on the White House lawn, and his supporter would defend it. Or at least ignore it.

 One of many things that bother me, is how so many Christians seem to put hope in Trump over God. "He is the only one standing between us and socialism", etc. And no Christian worth their salt should be chirping his "MAGA" slogan. Isn't God the only one to do that?

  A Biden presidency would unite conservatives. In some ways, we would be better off under him than under Trump.And Christians would care again about morals and character in politicians. To quote myself, there is really nothing wrong for a politician to do. It just matters who he is, as to who will call it wrong.

 Do I want Biden as president? No. Neither do I want Trump. We are back at 2016. Two old corrupt and rich liberals who need to retire. Two bad choices. Two evils.

10) Corona 3

  I live in a small Ohio town that is right on the Ohio/PA border. I can be in PA by car in 5 minutes or less. Since moving here, the closest Walmart is in PA, 12 minutes away vs the closest one in Salem, Ohio about 30 minutes away, so I usually go to the PA one unless I want to do more shopping in Salem. When there are other stores open.

 I went to the PA Walmart Monday afternoon, walked up to where they had it roped off for people to line up - no line, thankfully. There was a Walmart employee and a cop standing there. The cop stopped me and informed me that I had to have a mask on to go in. Thankfully, I had one in my car....but I honestly didn't know they were doing that. I thought it was stupid, and way too much overreach. What is next? A Hazmat suit?

 From what I have read, the average mask doesn't protect you from even the flu. Just how much more are they going to demand, and how much more are we going to comply with? Fortunately, Ohio isn't doing that yet, so I am going to drive further to that Walmart to return a couple items and buy a few things. As long as I don't have to mask up to shop in Ohio, I will avoid PA.

11) Thinking for yourself

  How much do we really think for ourselves? For years, we have heard how Democrats and the liberal media spin things and control what we hear. They want us to think and believe a certain way.

 But are Republicans and conservatives any different? Pretty much any idea or conspiracy theory on social media is just regurgitated ideas and theories from fake conservatives like Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, and others. Fox News included. What is being propagated and shared by so many conservatives is not original with those sharing it. In most, if not all cases, it came from these radio personalities who are telling their listeners how to think.

   And our churches? Don't get me wrong, I am not taking God out of the equation. But I have questioned a few things my church teaches and believes, and no one can give a good answer. Here is something that may come as a shock: No church is 100% right. There are some that are 100% wrong, but none are 100% right. I don't want to give the idea that my church is a cult, or that you are shunned if you dare question something.....but I have gotten the idea from years of church attendance that thinking for yourself isn't the thing to do. Just do what the church teaches and don't divert from what it believes, and keep all the rules.

 Thinking for myself is why I am where I am politically. It is why I disagree with pretty much all of my relatives and fellow church members. I researched, dared to think as an individual instead of as a Republican, and it led to the stand I took and still take.

 Conspiracy theories are abounding, which just make people look foolish. I have never been a conspiracy theorist kind of guy, but what if those in power and position don't want people thinking for themselves? Whether they be liberals, conservatives, Republicans, congressmen, the president of the US, your church, etc....what if they don't want people who think for themselves, but instead want people who will do as they say and believe what they tell them without questioning it?

12) I'm an addict

  I discovered Outshine Bars a few years ago on vacation in the Outerbanks. They are frozen fruit bars that have real fruit juice in, and in the case of the first ones I tried - pineapple - they have chunks of pineapple in. My two favorites are pineapple and grape. I have been eating a lot of them during this quarantine. I am almost ashamed to admit I ate a whole 6 pack box of the grape one day this pasy week. They are sooo good. They taste like frozen grape juice. Yeah, I am addicted. :) I highly recommend them. There are other flavors, but the two I mentioned are the best. And a word of advice: skip the coconut. I like coconut, but it wasn't a good choice for these bars.

**I since also bought raspberry. I forgot how good they are. Some flavors are easier to find, and it is one that is not..so I hadn't had it for a while. I also recommend it :)

13) Light of the world

  In Matthew 5: 14-16, Jesus said this:

14 You are like light for the whole world. A city built on top of a hill cannot be hidden, 15 and no one would light a lamp and put it under a clay pot. A lamp is placed on a lampstand, where it can give light to everyone in the house. 16 Make your light shine, so that others will see the good that you do and will praise your Father in heaven. (CEV)

   Disclaimer: My Christian walk is extremely shaky, and is not one to emulate....so please don't think I am setting myself up as some kind of example to follow, or get the idea that I think I am perfect. I am not, and I don't think that. I really don't like anything about myself, including my spiritual walk...so no, I don't think I am better than anyone else.  OK, now that I got that out of the way:

   Are we being a light to the world? With all of our conspiracy theories, trashing politicians we don't like, going after people who don't support our politician, posting things that aren't true, being too political, too confrontational, etc. Seriously. Are we truly being a light to the world? Do Christians care enough about what the world is seeing...not just in the day to day being around neighbors and coworkers, but what we are like on social media? Are we being a good witness for Jesus, or just for our political views? What is more important to we American Christians: defending and/or attacking politicians and those who differ politically than us, or spreading the Gospel? What is more important: winning a political argument, or winning a soul for Jesus? What is more of a priority to us: winning someone to vote for our candidate, or winning that person to Jesus? If the latter is truly the case in those questions, then how is our social media presence affecting that and reflecting that?

   I'll be honest. Never have I been closer to walking away from God and the church and not looking back, then I have in the last 4 years. Yeah, I have fought back.....something I wish I had learned to do when I was being bullied in school....but I am far more vulnerable and more easily hurt than anyone would ever guess. It is another "perk" of being a guy dealing with same-sex attractions. I have also been guilty of watching people too much, and letting their spiritual walk and actions affect me too much. I won't give details of the who's and all that has been said, but I have been disgusted and disillusioned with this American version of Christianity that has in my opinion been poisoned and sidetracked by politics. My church is a holiness church, one that believes in sanctification. I have no use for that doctrine. I wasn't really believing in it for a long time, but these last few years have destroyed any lingering doubts I had about it. When it comes to politics, Christians are no different than the world, and holiness church people are no different than anyone else. (And no, not every person from my church has to my knowledge

 What does that mean for me? It means I am truly trying to back away from politics, but it is difficult. I have a lot of anger in me about it, and have explained in this and a previous post why that is the case. Having attempts to shut me up and down, and essentially being told my opinions don't matter and should not be shared has caused a lot of anger that I am not sure how to get rid of. Maybe I do need to un-follow everyone on social media who is political. I am so tired of the double standards, of Christians praising politicians more than Jesus, of people caring more about defending a politician than caring about how their words might make me feel.

 Christians in the past and today are being tortured for their faith. They have forgiven people for atrocities we haven't come close to witnessing....yet we can't handle people criticizing a politician or disagreeing with us politically. What pathetic excuses for Christians have we American Christians become.

 The day may come when Christians in America are faced with true persecution. We may face situations where we have to forgive what seems impossible to forgive. If we can't handle those who disagree with us politically, or handle our candidates being criticized, then how on earth will we handle true persecution?

  I got a card in the mail this week from someone who hasn't had an easy life for most of their life. It was just a card saying they knew I had been laid off, and wanted to know they cared and was praying for me. A very nice gesture. This same person sent me this message today:

Obviously I'll never be a never trumper but let me share what's frustrating to me... so many conservatives speak out against dr Levine but adore trump. I want you to know that I am not in agreement...I still support trump in spite of his flaws (he has many) simply because he is the best of the choices... and has done positive things for our country... but im aghast at the hypocrisy right now. Please know we're not all like that. (Saw the crap you got today on Facebook)

 This is a person I admire. They have come far, and the card and the message meant a lot to me. Maybe I need to be more like her.....though I will never, ever support Trump - I don't mean that.

  Maybe forgiveness is the key. I have always had a difficult time forgiving, even myself. Dumb things I have done and said often play over and over like a record skipping (those were before CDs). And forgiveness needs to be on all sides. I have seen and heard enough to know that even though I am guilty of no offense by voting third party, there are a lot of Christians who need to forgive people for not voting the way they wanted us to. Good grief...their guy won anyway, so why hold a grudge?!

 I honestly believe the best thing for the church and for Christians spiritually speaking, would be to be under Democrat rule and lose our freedoms. Do I want that? No way! But our modern Christianity is too weak, too influenced by the world, politics, and other things that we should be influencing instead of being influenced by. We have become salt that has lost its savor. We think God is involved and cares about our politics and who is president, while He is concerned about our hearts, and what we are doing for Him and for the Kingdom of Heaven. Can we honestly believe He is pleased with what He sees?

  I want a relationship with God that is not weakened or affected by things like politics. I want to love people and be their friend no matter what their political views are.

March musings

  It is three months into the year, and I have blogged once. Sorry to the one or two people who read and are interested in my blog.....

  The reason is most likely depression related. Even though I have been on two meds, one for depression and one for anxiety, they just don't seem to be working anymore. The other time it was close to this bad, I lost my interest in reading. This time around, I don't want to be around people, with the exception of family.... and by people, I mean groups of people, though I am pretty content to stay home and not be around anyone.  I even dislike going to church and being around so many people - don't look so horrified, unless you have been severely depressed, you wouldn't get it...... and I dread work days, even though I like my job.....it is just a constant barrage of people, and I'd rather be at home by myself. Maybe that explains hermits and recluses....maybe they are just severely depressed people who don't want to be around others. I think the depression was compounded by my last birthday when I was hit with so many negative emotions, and had the desire stronger than ever for a family of my own......an impossibly.

But enough about my emotions and mental state. I hope this blog doesn't go on too long, but it will be one with multiple subjects that I will most likely work on over a period of a few days. It all depends on what is on my mind.

***Man, this is long. No one is going to read it all :)

1) Politics

  I am trying more than ever to stay away from politics on social media. I may address it some on here. It is MY blog after all, and people read it at their own risk. I am extremely bothered more and more as the days go by at how political Christians have become, and how it takes precedence over God's Word in how Christians act and react. I have noticed it more since 2016, maybe because I have been on the outside looking in on conservative and Republican politics.

 I took a step last month I had been considering for a while. I un-registered to vote. I have previously been a strong proponent of voting, but I have my reasons for doing so. I may register again at some point, but it will be Independent if I do so. No one is ever going to infer or say that that the Republican Party owns my vote or that I must vote Republican if I am a registered Republican.

 Is it hypocritical of me to do this after being so emphatic about voting? Maybe, maybe not. We are allowed to change and evolve in our thinking and beliefs. If for years I was outspoken against women, saying they had no right to vote, no right to do anything but be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen.....then I flipped on that thinking, would it be bad and hypocritical of me? No one would think so. (And that was a made up example...I don't think that).

  I have become so disgusted by the Republican party, so-called conservatism, and politics in general, that I want nothing to do with it. I know all of the arguments one could throw at me, but the truth of the matter is the Republican party keeps putting up worse and worse and more liberal candidates each election, and unless they do better than 2016, I can't see me ever voting for their candidates again. "But the Democrats will win." Yeah, they might.....but I didn't want the one who won in 2016 to win either. And maybe a liberal president would get the American Christians' attention back on God instead of politics if we needed to pray more about our nation and what we might face.

  It truly wasn't a careless decision to un-register to vote, but I do feel good about it. And who knows...maybe it will keep me out of jury duty. :)

  Something great would be if a 3rd party would actually have a chance. The two main parties are too corrupt and too much alike. We need a change.

 And a warning if you have read this far: #11 and #12 will be about Donald Trump.

2) I like a Justin Bieber song

  Yeah, I was shocked too. There is a song I heard a few times while on break in the coffee shop at work. They usually have country music playing in there. I liked it, and had no clue who sang it. I finally looked it up the other night and discovered it is a by a duo called Dan + Shay doing a trio number with none other than Justin Bieber. Wow. Who knew?! It is a pretty cool song, titled 10,000 Hours. I did find out Justin no longer sound like a girl when he sings. The first time I know of hearing a song by him a few years back, I thought it was a girl singing. Guess he is out of puberty now. :)

 Confession: I like some country music. I grew up in a church where it was considered wrong. I heard it preached against, but then I heard Southern Gospel preached against....The country music on my iTunes is wide and varied, a few songs by certain artists.

 Maybe I am wrong on my thinking, but I believe Christians should listen mostly to Christian music. If one is truly a Christian, aren't they going to want to listen to music about the one they serve? However, I don't believe secular music is wrong, depending on the lyrics and maybe other factors. Southern Gospel will always be my favorite genre', followed by some CCM, Praise and Worship, and country.

 I do believe one should not follow too closely or idolize any singer or group, no matter their belief system or lifestyle. For instance, I like a few songs by Tim McGraw, but he and his wife are brainless when it comes to the Second Amendment.

 Below is one of my all time favorite country songs: Live Like You Are Dying by Tim McGraw.





3) All things gay

  There doesn't seem to be much middle ground on views of gay issues. On one side you have the agenda to push all things gay everywhere and on everyone. They are even pushing it on kid's programs on TV and in movies. On the other hand, you have the evangelical Christians acting like it is the worst sin ever, and not having much love, if any, for gay people.

 Even some of the groups and people I follow on Facebook who are same-sex attracted Christians practicing Biblical sexuality lean too far the wrong way.

 Brief explanation of 3 main views in the Christian world of same-sex attracted individuals?

Ex-gay: Those who firmly believe it is wrong, and work at staying away from all things gay. Often they use programs and groups to help battle the attractions and desires.

Side A: they believe you can be a Christian and have sexual relations with the same sex...possibly within marriage - not positive about that - and believe in gay marriage. They embrace all things gay, while claiming to be Christians. They pretty much hate ex-gays.

Side B: They practice celibacy, and cling to terms like gay and queer like we conservatives cling to our guns. (Which reminds me, I haven't shot my pistol since Thanksgiving.....) Many, like the guys on the site Your Other Brothers, watch gay programming, and embrace pretty much anything gay except the sex. Some, if not all, approve of same sex relationships minus the sex, though a lot of them are willing to call Side A Christians and take offense at anyone daring to say Side A can't be Christians if they are having sex with the same gender. Believe me, I know. I have dared to say that and have been ripped apart by Side B people.

 Me? As I have no problem admitting, am attracted to other guys, a battle I have had for most of my life. I believe what the Bible says, and I also believe it is wrong for a Christian to use terms like gay and queer as identities if they are truly serving God....something I have debated many people on. I know of one young guy, one of the Your Other Brothers guys, who is a preacher and proudly calls himself queer. I may blog about that identity thing more some other time. (Calling yourself queer or gay, and clinging to everything gay except the sex surely doesn't fall in what the Bible says about laying aside the weights and sin that so easily takes a hold over us).

 My main focus was meant to be on how Christians should act. I took my three lovely nieces out for Mexican a couple of weeks ago (in the olden days when you could eat inside a restaurant) , and the subject somehow came up. I don't remember exactly how she worded it, but my youngest niece voiced that Christians need to be more careful what they say about gay people, and how they act about it. And she is so right. The answer is not to pay gay people on the back and tell them God is fine with their lifestyle and actions. That is only helping them to a an eternity in hell, but Christians need to stop acting like it is the worst sin ever, and that gay people have a contagious disease.

 I have related this story before on my blog, but I have something to add to it, so excuse the repeat if you have read it before: About 11-12 years ago, my Sunday School class was covering some main issues of our day. One was homosexuality, and it was brutal. I was still extremely in the closet about my SSA. There were two men who were especially vocal and un-Christian in what they said. One said he would rather have a murderer around his kids than have "one of those perverts" around them. If it happened now, I would probably stand up and say what I thought. Instead, I sat there fighting tears and the desire to walk out.

 Not too long after that, one of those men was caught viewing pornography on the computer of the Christian business he worked at. His wife still hasn't forgiven him, and it was rough on his kids. But it doesn't end there. A couple weeks ago - oh, this is what brought up the discussion with my nieces - I saw a friend suggestion for this man's oldest daughter who has walked away from God and the way she was raised. Her background picture is her kissing someone. I was curious if it was the same young man she had been dating a few years ago, so I looked better, and discovered it was another female and she is engaged to marry her.

 I feel bad for her and her family, and don't share that as a "haha on him" thing. The point I want to make is we truly need to do better in regards to what we say about gay people, and how we act. There are a lot of people who are SSA and hiding it from everyone - their parents, their siblings, their best friends......even their spouse. It is scary to tell people, and it is no wonder. It could be your child, your sibling, your parent, your spouse....your pastor. People don't choose to have the attractions, and the attractions and desires are not discriminatory or picky in who they hit.

 Think about it: If you have a nasty opinion of gay people, call them perverts, say they deserve AIDS, etc....do you think anyone is ever going to come to you with their struggle? Do you think it will strengthen your relationship if you are acting so horribly about what they are secretly struggling with? What if someone you love deeply is secretly struggling with it, and you talk hatefully about gay people around them?

  Since "outting" myself on this blog a few years ago, I haven't seen any repercussions or heard of any....but I am a loner. There really isn't anyone other than my nieces or nephews that I can call up and meet for lunch.....but then I always pay for theirs..... :)......and I usually talk to the same few people at church. I don't know who knows and who doesn't know, and am not close enough to enough people to notice any difference. Maybe a lot of people don't know. They would have to have personally been told by me, read my blog, figured it out, or been told by someone else. That brings up an interesting question....do the church gossips know?

 True story: I have had bigger repercussions and bad reactions for daring to speak out against and not vote for Donald Trump than for "coming out of the closet" as a guy with same-sex attractions.

  I'll close this already too long part with two stories, the first is one I have related before:

There was a young man who played guitar in the worship band for his church. He met with his pastor and confessed that he was attracted to other males and needed help and prayer. His pastor promised to pray for him, and they parted ways. At the next service at that church, the pastor told about it from the pulpit, turned to the horrified young man standing on the platform behind him, and told him to leave his church and never come back....... that "his kind" were not welcome there.

The other was related to me by my retired Christian friend who volunteers at the hospital 2 days a week:

 A few years back, his church was looking for a pastor and were considering a pastor from another state. The church got a letter from some individual warning them not to consider this pastor. He had a gay son, and the son and his gay friends occasionally came to the church the pastor was currently at. 

Horrors! Sinners going to church!

 Sadly, that scared enough members to reject that pastor. I wonder what Jesus would have done and what He would say about gay people going to church? What would your church say about gay people attending there?


4) Valentine's Day

















   Valentine's Day, or Singles Awareness Day, is just another day for me. I did have something special happen this year. My 6 nieces and nephews went together and bought me some of my favorite snacks, and my youngest niece and her boyfriend delivered them that evening after they ate out and got engaged...then visited with me for a while without telling me. They figured I would tell it before they told anyone else. Valid point :)

 I am really happy for them. He is a great guy for her. A September wedding is planned.

 And they made my day and made me feel very loved by their gift and card.


5) Praying for Pelosi

  Of all the American politicians in my lifetime, Nancy Pelosi wins my award for the worst......even over Obama. Scary she is two steps from the presidency. She stands against everything Christians believe, and is for everything we oppose and for things bad for our country.

 But here is a question for you, especially if you are a Trump supporter who likes to say we are supposed to pray for him: Do you pray for her? Do you love her? Believe you me, I have heard so many times how I should pray for Trump, but do those same people pray for Pelosi and others like her? After all the same Bible they are quoting saying to pray for Trump also says to pray for your enemies.

 That is something we are all pretty much guilty of: picking and choosing what parts of the Bible to use and emphasize. Politics plays into that. In my not so humble opinion, it is a cancer that is infecting the church and Christianity. It has canceled out the loving people and being peacemakers parts of the Bible, and become an emphasis on praying for a politician.

 I'll admit it. I don't pray for Pelosi. I have prayed for Trump, but he is still president, so that prayer didn't get answered. Kidding. Kind of.

  And why is it OK for we Christians to attack Democrats with a D by their name, and say whatever we want to? If it is wrong to say certain things about some politicians, then why is it OK to say them about others?

 I have considered making a list of the Scriptures we toss aside when politics invades....like turn the other cheek, be peacemakers, be tender and forgiving to each other.....but I am afraid it would be too long of a list. Whether conservative, Trump supporter, #nevertrump, liberal, or whatever.......too many Christians don't act like Christians when politics invades the scene.

6) Anthony Schmidt

 A page popped up on Facebook this evening as a suggestion to like. I checked it out, and was impressed. Anthony Schmidt is a 12 year old autistic boy who photographs toy cars and makes them look life-sized. It is really cool.

His page is: https://www.facebook.com/anthonyryanschmidt/

There is also a kickstarter page that has some of his stuff: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/anthonyschmidt/small-cars-big-inspiration?fbclid=IwAR012XfPgxYbGvjr6_cZd-2nwBzG5PaORYosZ6gQDHNyq6UHQW_5Kh0KGZk

*7) The flag and the 3 Hebrew children

  OK, this is kind of political too, but not about politicians. I read a statement a few weeks ago that has stuck with me. I can't remember where I read it, but this is the gist of it: "The same people cheering for Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego for refusing to bow to the golden stature are the same people outraged when people won't stand for or pledge to the flag."

 I'll be blunt. Colin Keppernick is a spoiled overpaid athlete who is also an idiot. I wish my bank account reflected how oppressed he is. I was bothered by his actions, and annoyed when Nike made him a spokesman. It didn't affect me, since I have boycotted Nike all of my life because I am not paying that kind of money for a shoe.

 But here is a question: from all I have seen of him - and the last I knew, he was pursuing Islam - the guy is not a Christian, so he is not headed for Heaven. If you are reading this, I assume you are first of all desperate for reading material, and that you are a Christian. So Christian, I have a question for you. Which bothers you more: the fact that he has dissed our flag and country, or the fact that he is most likely headed for an eternity in hell.(gotta add the most likely so I am not accused of judging!)

 Sadly, I would wager that the average American Christian hasn't given much or any thought to his spiritual condition, or cares much about it, if any.

 And by the way, I am not comparing standing for the flag and pledging to bowing to a statue. Though even patriotism can become an idol. What I AM saying is perhaps we Christians shouldn't be so easily offended by people refusing to stand and pledge to our flag....or so easily offended in general.  Even if we don't agree with their reasons, it is their right just as the 3 Hebrew kids had reasons for not bowing to the statue.

 I love our flag and am very patriotic. In fact, my bedroom is decorated in Americana/patriotic themes.

 Ever wonder what you would have done if you were in the 3 Hebrew kids' shoes? I think some of us would bow and rationalize it. "I'll bow and pretend I am bowing to the statute, but inside I will be bowing to and praying to the true God." "I'll repent later." "Surely God doesn't expect me to risk my life over this! He'll understand if I bow." "I'll offend the king if I don't bow, and Christians aren't supposed to offend." I could see me doing that. Or not. It hasn't been easy taking a stand opposite my family and so many in my church in regards to politics. Who knows.

 What matters is that we take a stand for God and right today.

 The day may come in America when Christians don't have rights and freedoms. The freedoms are dwindling and usually lose when they come up against liberals. The day may come when we don't want to stand for and pledge to the flag, so maybe we shouldn't be so dogmatic about the issue. (I say that, but I'll probably be ticked the next time someone refuses to do it........)

8) New drink (to me)

  My 2 favorite drinks are diet caffeine free Coke and diet Gold Peak Tea. I am not a huge pop drinker. It is my drink of choice when I have pizza and some other foods, but I don't go and get a can out of the fridge when I am thirsty. I drink a lot of the tea and water.

 One of the things in my snack basket from the nieces and nephews was a box of the Crystal Light packets you mix with a bottled water. The flavor is raspberry lemonade. I liked it so much that I bought the size you add to 2 quarts of water. I also got cherry limeade to try. It is pretty good too. I may try to drink more of that drink as it would save me money on all the tea I buy. I go through a lot of it, and usually have at least 4 64-oz bottles of it on hand, 2 of them in the fridge.

9) The vacation

 The last week of February, I took a week's vacation. Since the 5 days I requested were book-ended  by two weekends off, that turned into 9 days off in a row. It was awesome. I went to Sugarcreek, Ohio on Monday and Tuesday, and took advantage of the package deal the Dutch Hose Inn there does during their slower times.

 The rest of the time, I spent most of at home. (Maybe I could be a recluse...) I really like how I have my place fixed up. Even though I never have company, I enjoy it. And I am not what some consider typical bachelors to be like. I keep the place clean and mostly clutter free. Once in a while, the dining room table gets away from me. And I hate to dust. Dishes in the sink bug me, so unless I am soaking something, they don't stay there very long before being washed. The dish drainer is a different matter. Dishes put there to dry can stay there several days, and I often pull dishes from there to use instead of from the cupboards.

 I did do some housework on my vacation, but outside of church and my 2 day trip, I pretty much stayed home away from everyone.

 Speaking of company, my two oldest nieces have not been to my new place yet (moved here in August). They are bad with directions, and don't know how to get here. I need to fix that.

 Back to the trip: I enjoyed my free breakfast and late lunch, plus all the other free stuff. I did a lot of shopping, and bought several more books. Yeah, like I don't have enough.

9) Corona virus

  When people first started talking about the Cornona virus, I thought it was a joke that had to do with the beer. Then I found out it was a real thing.

 I am not saying we shouldn't be careful, but every couple of years there is a new disease that everyone freaks out about, and maybe a few people die from......but it never amounts to much. It is just a bunch of hysteria. More people die in the U.S. from the flu than from Corona, Ebola, etc.

 Since I started working at the hospital 7 years ago in June, I have become germophoic. I constantly sanitize, and always use a paper towel to open the bathroom doors. Why do so many people not wash their hands after using the bathroom?! It is nasty! I even see it at church, then those people shake hands with at least the pastor who shakes hands with everyone in the church. Maybe we need hand sanitizer stations in the church.......

Seriously, the media blows these things out of proportion, and everyone panics. We had boxes of masks at the hospital in different locations for people - there is a hand sanitizer stand with 2 boxes of masks in the lobby where I work - but they had to remove them all. People were taking them home. I came in one morning, and there had been a full box and at least half of another out. The half or so box was gone - box and all - and the full box was empty. There is no way they got emptied out by normal use after I left at 5 pm.

 I don't need to relate everything that is going on  - the TP shortage, etc...if you are paying attention, you know. It is like our country has gone insane. Thankfully, I tend to overstock on that important paper product, and should have enough to last me for quite a while. I was amazed when I was at Walmart today.

I am even getting emails from restaurants telling what they are doing to take precautions.

 Personally, I think it will all blow over in a few weeks. I could be wrong. We will see. I did have a lady preacher tell me yesterday that her prophetess friend prophesied a cure would be found on March 27. This was after I offered  her a mask from my secret stash after explaining we can't have them out since people are taking too many. She proved my point by saying "I'm taking a few"...and took 4."

 Sadly, those who should be trusting God seem to be panicking with everyone else.

***Things have obviousy gotten much worse since I wrote this - one hazard of working on a blog post over a period of a couple of weeks. I did finally manage to find ground hamburger and sausage.

 And if you haven't watched this, you should. It is only a few seconds past a minute long.





10) Division in politics

  It does bother me how much politics has divided us. Obama divided this country like it hadn't been in many years, and then Trump came along and hasn't done anything to make it better, and went a step further by dividing Christians and conservatives. That is one reason I am trying to back off, but it really isn't fair that people who oppose him are expected to be silent, while Trump supporters bash whoever they want.

 I think politicians thrive on dividing America, Trump included. (If that wasn't the case, he would never have called we conservatives who oppose him "human scum".) The politicians in the two main parties are not that different anymore, but they sure succeed in getting their supporters fighting with each other. It doesn't help that politicians care more about their agenda and pleasing those who support them the most with $$.

 It is just sad that Christians aren't any different or better about how we act in regards to politics than those who do not profess to Christianity, and too many people in the church circles I have been raised in don't act any better than the world when it comes to politics.

  Maybe social media makes it worse. I am a conservative, so I remember opposing the Clintons and mostly liking Bush. The internet and social media was all expanding when he was president. I remember there being  "Kill Bush" Facebook groups, and reporting them with no luck. Then I get Facebook jail for saying no Muslim should be in any American government office. True story.

 I don't know what the answer is. Evidently it isn't God, since God's people aren't any different than the world. And the first part of that was sarcastic. I know God is the answer to any problem.

 Maybe I just need to start doing my part, but it is so frustrating being in the place I am: being conservative and Christian, but not supporting the man so many others do. I may address my frustrations at the end of this post.

***I am seriously backing off after this on Trump. Not because my opinions of him have changed for the better, and not because I believe I have no right. I am just really tired of him and of the attitudes that I have no right to speak out against him.

11) Donald Trump (You were warned)

 Yeah, you knew I'd get to him at some point. Read no further if you are one who thinks he should not be criticized. By the way, my favorite cousin said I am too focused on Trump. It is hard not to be when my Facebook feed looks like praise and worship time of Trump. Seriously, how many pro-Trump posts do people need a day? And did people not notice all of my anti-Obama posts I did for 8 years....back when freedom of speech applied to me? :)

  I am 100% serious when I say this: I am concerned about the Trump mania by so many Christians. The things this man is guilty of and the way he acts, you would think Christians would want nothing to do with him, but many praise and defend him like he is their religion.

 Back during the 2016 election, I read an interesting comment. I don't remember who it was, but he said if you were going to vote for Trump in the election, you should do it weeping and sorrowing that your voting choice had to be a man like him.

 And let's get the Christian stuff out of the way here. Trump's supposed conversion came right at election time when he needed the Christian vote. James Dobson announced the conversion. Trump didn't even do that. If he still had had a D by his name, the same people believing his conversion would be as skeptical of it as I am. And if you believe he is one, than you should also accept Hillary's and Obama's claims of being a Christian.

 The problem is that if a politician does enough that Christians in America agree with, then they translate that to his being a Christian and chosen by God. Political issues define a politician's spiritual state.

 But anyway, let's recap:
a) Long time liberal, long time supporter of liberals and their causes, including the Clintons.

b) Committed adultery on at least 2 of his wives

c) Bragged about grabbing women by their genitals in vulgar terms. Something that is sexual assault, by the way

d) Paid of a prostitute

e) Even now, is vulgar

f) Current wife was in lesbian porn

g) Fought the Tea Party

h) Said that Hillary would make a great president

i) Defended Bill Clinton during the sexual accusations, and attacked the women.

j) Defended Hillary during Benghazi

k) has done gun control measures, and talked about doing more

l) Has his kids in White House positions, something that would be decried were it anyone else

m) Acts like an immature brat on Twitter, and attacks people for daring to criticize him

n) Promised to further gay rights

o) appeared at a LGBQT for Trump rally holding their flag.

p) supported transgenders using whatever bathroom they wanted

q) strip clubs in his casinos

r) draft dodger

   And I could come up with enough to go beyond Z if I thought longer.  My point is, there is nothing about this man that should have Christians so enthralled with him. I could not do it, but I understand people voting for him over Hillary....though I wanted neither.....but I cannot understand the daily over the top posts praising and defending him. For way too many Christians, defending him is more important than how they treat we who dare speak up.

 Not all Trump voters and supporters are alike, but the Trump support movement has been compared to a cult, and there are some similarities. Consider this: Not only will the average Trump supporter refuse to criticize him - and he has done things that should be criticized - they try to stop others from criticizing him. There is an unhealthy loyalty to the man. At best, some will say "he isn't a good man, but....."

I have a  friend - or I guess former friend now - from work who is a Christian, but has an unhealthy idolization of Trump. My atheist buddy from work commented about how often she posts about him, and said you'd think that is who she worships. His words. Anyway, she posted the following on Wednesday. I know it was bad, but I commented "Go ahead". And she did. It is pretty bad if a Christian doesn't want anyone for friends who dares say something negative about a politician and doesn't stand for her post.

  It is sad that supporting him has become equal to being conservative, and sadder still that supporting him has become synonymous with evangelical Christianity. Trump is NOT a good man, and it truly is alarming to me how over the top loyal so many Christians even in my own church are. It seems the worse he acts, the madder he makes Democrats....the more Christians love him.

  And this will be a strong statement and rather incendiary: but I understand the atheist friends of a friend of mine: they said after the way Christians defended his moral flaws and supported him in 2016, they never want to hear another Christian talk about morals. They have a point. If a Christian tosses aside all of his immoral stuff, then they do have no right to moral outrage. A Facebook friend of mine did a daring post a while back. He said that one thing gay presidential candidate Pete Buettig did was get Trump supporters caring about morals again.

  Lastly: I am not saying it IS a cult, nor that all who vote for him are over the top loyal. And I will add this: the more people have tried to silence me - some even ordering me to stop criticizing him - the more I dislike him and despise politics and the Republican Party. I am weary of this attitude that he should not be criticized. That is not American, that is not free speech, and it is not Christian. It all truly has shaken my faith, and shaken the beliefs my church has.

 Vote for him if you must. Support what you consider right that he does......but don't defend everything he says and does. Don't idolize him, and stop trying to shut down those of us who bring up legitimate criticisms and concerns.

12) Why I dislike Trump so much (remember...you were warned)

  I know a lot of people don't understand why I dislike the man so much.....well, I don't understand how anyone can like him very much, so we are even :)

 So, I thought I would try to put it into words for anyone interested in knowing why. I will say this up front: my dislike has been fanned as much by his supporters as by him.

His morals:

  If Trump supporters and voters are honest, Trump is not a nice man, nor a good man. The Christian right has spent the last several years before Trump all up in arms about morals. How many politicians have we stood back outraged over their immoral discretions: Gary Hart, the Kennedys, Bill Clinton, and more.

 Then comes along Trump: serial adulterer who they say bragged about it, has strip clubs in his casinos (I thought for sure that would sink his Christian support), vulgar (just recently use the f-word, so that hasn't changed), bragged about sexually assaulting women), and did and said other questionable things.

 Suddenly, morals in a politician weren't important. Beating Hillary was more important than what we stood for and against for years.

 I'll be honest. I've done things I wished I hadn't....but I wasn't running for president, and these are many of the same people who still act like being gay is the worst sin ever, while they embrace the likes of Trump. The double standard disgusted me, and the push by so many religious leaders for people to vote for him and ignore their conscience and long held principles knocked my faith for a loop.

The lies and false accusations

 To be anti Trump after the 2016 primaries made you a pariah. The truth didn't matter anymore, and Christians suddenly were OK with false accusations and untrue statements:

"If you are not for Trump, you are for Hillary"
"If you aren't for Trump, you are for Hillary and for baby killing"
"A 3rd party vote is a vote for Hillary" huh?!
"If you don't vote for Trump, you are a Pharisee"

 It didn't matter if you honestly felt you could not as a Christian vote for him, other Christians were determined to guilt or scare you into going against your convictions and conscience... even people in my own church.

 Don't believe in wearing ties? They understand that and won't try to change your mind.
Don't believe in drinking coffee? No worries.
Don't believe you should vote for Trump? You Pharisee! You must vote for him.!
(And yes, I know people who don't believe they should wear ties or drink coffee).

Untrue posts

 This is different from above. There are a lot of Trump supporters who will post anything that makes him look good, whether or not it is true. And yes, I have a couple of examples.

1) We can say Merry Christmas again since Trump is president. Newsflash: we were allowed to say Merry Christmas under Obama. It was never outlawed.

2) He is the best president ever! Even if I liked the man, I would find this statement untrue. I personally believe he is one of the worst when all is taken into consideration, but that is me. But take into consideration all of the presidents before him....come on, it just takes a little bit of thinking to know it isn't true.

3) He is the most pro-life president we ever have had. He still has not de-funded Planned Parenthood, and he signed a bill funding them. How can anyone say that with a straight face?

4) The Bible is his favorite book. Uh, no it isn't. The man did nothing remotely Christian until he needed the Christian vote, and has done nothing to warrant such a wild notion.

  Those are a few right off the top of my head, but there have been many stories and posts that are simply not true. I know...when Obama was president, I loved to share stories that showed how bad he was, but I found a lot that were not true after researching a bit. That might be something we all should do before so quickly sharing news stories.

The Biblical comparisons

 Trump has been compared to Bible characters such as David, Queen Esther, Sampson, and others. His impeachment trial was compared to the trial of Jesus. It is rather nauseating if you don't like the man.

Multiple Facebook posts

 Maybe it is wrong of me, but I am un-following a lot of people on Facebook who post constantly praising and defending Trump, or attacking anyone who dares oppose him. A while back, I counted the posts of a couple people. I went past 30 posts on both before I got to one that wasn't about him. Some of these people post dozens of pro-Trump posts a week...then they are upset if I do one against him a few times a month. Go figure. It is a true statement that was mocked that a lot of people praise Trump more on social media than they praise God.

 Here's the thing: I have people wanting me to shut up with my criticisms of him, yet they are posting constantly in support of him while bashing the politicians they don't like....are you starting to understand my frustration?

 I am not saying people shouldn't post post about him....but how many posts in a day and week are necessary? I was tempted to pick some celebrity and post as often about them as so many do about Trump to prove a point, but it would go over their heads, I am sure.

Snowflakes reporting

 Back around the election, one of my Facebook "friends" was reporting to my sister and brother in law who were not on Facebook about what I was saying about Trump on Facebook. It caused problems in my family, and if I knew who it was, I would most likely block them.

 More recently, one of my best friends at work (who is not on social media) told me that coworkers who are on Facebook are always calling her to complain about what I said about Trump. Really?! Are we in grade school?

Silence of his wrongs

 I wish I had kept a list of things, but maybe it is good that I didn't. There have been so many things Trump and his family have done that if it was someone with a D by their name, his supporters would be outraged....but since it is Trump, they are not only silent, they are outraged when someone points the wrong out. Go figure. Shoot the messenger. Though I can't remember a lot of them, I do remember a few:

Gun control: All Obama had to do was mention gun control, and we conservatives went nuts. Trump actually enacted some and wanted to do more, and there was silence. I brought them up to my former friend I mentioned previously. She defended him - of course - and asked if it directly affected me.

Ivanka: Trump's daughter has a lot of the same ideas as Hillary - and there are people wanting a Trump family presidency for the next several years....but yet conservatives don't care. Just this week, it came out that she was doing White House business on private servers just like Hillary did. But she is a Trump, so it doesn't matter.

 There are other Trumps working in the White House, all lifelong liberals too... and were it a president with a D by his name, conservatives would care about the nepotism.

Golfing: When Obama was president, it was a big issue how much he golfed. Trump has done it more, and cost the country far more than his supposed not taking a salary would cost.

Praising dictators: his relationship with and praise of the North Korea dictator amazed even me. The guy has had his own people killed. He isn't a good guy.

Twitter: The man acts like an immature brat on Twitter, attacking anyone who gave him a butt hurt.....but it seems the worse he acts, the more his supporters love him.

Double standards

Yeah, I have covered some, but it bears repeating: There are so many double standards with Trump that it is beyond ridiculous. There really isn't anything wrong for a president to do. It just matters what party he represents as to who will condemn it. There are things Obama did that conservatives criticized, but are OK with Trump doing, and there are things Obama did that liberals were OK with, but hate when Trump does it.

 Even in areas like Epstein. Conservatives love to connect Bill Clinton with Epstein and try the guilt by association angle, Sean Hannity especially. But yet Trump was good buddies with him too.....but that is hushed up.

The attempted censorship of criticism

 I guess the most frustrating thing for me is the attempts of people to silence criticisms of Trump. There seems to be an all too prevalent idea that criticism of anyone else is fine, but for some reason this very imperfect and corrupt billionaire should not be criticized. I honestly don't know if there is anything the man could do that would cause any of his supporters to criticize him. He did say he could shoot people on 5th ave in Manhattan and not lose any voters....it is scary that none of his voters seemed to take offense to that, and it is one time he did seem to tell the truth.

 In countries where there are dictators, criticism of that leader is not tolerated. Are we headed that way with Trump? Don't scoff if you are among those who won't criticize him or put up with criticism of him or his policies.

The over the top loyalty and defense

  When Trump is opposed or criticized, there are a lot of his supporters who immediately go on the attack. Defending him is more important than how they act or treat anyone. Loving your neighbor and other things like that don't matter.....defend Trump and shut that person up who dared speak up against him.

The over the top stuff

 This gets its own mention. I already talked about the comparisons to heroes of the Bible, but there have been other insane statements. There was the Trump/Pence thing where the trumpets in Revelation were compared to them.

 Over and over, we are told God chose him. So did God choose Obama too? Just because a certain amount of Americans like a president does not mean God chose him any more than presidents they don't like.

 And then there is the really wild stuff. Granted, it is like a really extreme fringe of Trump supporters, but they ARE Trump supporters.

 First, there is Jim Bakker saying if you don't like Trump, you aren't saved. But then one of my mom's cousins told me if I wasn't on Trump's side, I am not on God's.

 More recently is the Colberts, who I was not familiar with... and wish I still wasn't. On the Jim Bakker Show, they said if you oppose Trump, God will curse you, your children, and your children's children. Guess it is good I have no kids..... (Link here: https://deadstate.org/christian-activist-god-will-curse-the-children-and-grandchildren-of-people-who-opposed-trump/?fbclid=IwAR396_vnazaqUtXBbK9lYLVdW7H6SPGHaVZWO3RF8iFrwOquSa24LYHpqds)

  And there have been others.

The whitewashed political past

  People crack me up when they go on about how Trump isn't a politician and is going to drain the swamp, and other crazy talk like that.

 The facts:
Trump donated to liberals and their causes for years. He has been involved in politics for years. He helped fill that swamp with his money.

He was friends with the Clintons for years. He defended Bill during the sex accusations and Hillary during Benghazi. He attacked the women that accused Bill. He said Hillary would make a great president.

 The man did so much for liberals, but that is whitewashed and hushed up.


The gay issue

 I have thought a lot about this stuff, and I think another reason the Trump version of Christianity frustrates me so much, is because of my struggle. It really isn't easy being attracted to the same sex and believing what the Bible says. And I know how so many evangelical Christians feel about it. I know if I had ever truly came out as gay and lived that lifestyle openly, how Christians would react....yet so many Christians who are horrified by that sin have totally embraced Trump with all of his moral failures.

The push-back

 I criticized Obama freely for 8 years with upsetting only a few people. I even warned a coworker at the time who loved him that she might not want me to accept her friend request, but she said she could handle my criticisms of him. Spoiler alert: she couldn't. What pushed her over the edge was my reply to something she said that I think was election night 2012: "If you all think you can do better than him, why don't you run?!" Me: "Anyone could do better than him." :)

 Anyway, too many Trump supporters have this manic urge to defend him no matter what they have to do or say, and with no thought to how their words can affect the other person. Too many of the people in my life care more about protecting and defending the man they voted for than they care for me. Or at least their actions and reactions would make one assume.

 I was bullied a lot in school. The more I have seen Trump in action and how he treats people, the more of a bully he is in my eyes. And yet there are so many Christians protecting the bully on the playground and acting like he is some Savior.

 And THAT also bothers me. The man is a filthy rich politician. Yet he is the only one standing between us and socialism, ruin, etc. I think he has proven that too many Christians' faith is in the wrong things and people.

My faith

  I'll end with this: Everything added up to do with the 2016 election, Trump, and the actions and reactions of so many Christians even in my own church really damaged my faith. Shouldn't we be better than this? Shouldn't Christians act differently than the world in all areas......even politics?

 I don't know why it all affected me so much. I do know during the election time, I was really discouraged. Struggling with same-sex attractions is lonely and more difficult than anyone can ever imagine who has not been there themselves. Are there worse things? Yes, there are....but this is MY struggle, my cross.

 Trump came along, and the more I learned about him the more disgusted I was that he seemed to be winning the nomination...and then he won it. Some of the people who had fought him the hardest suddenly became the worst at attacking we who were not on the "Trump train." Four years later, I am still convinced I did the right thing by voting 3rd party...but I wish I had been silent. As I took a lot of heat from God's people, and saw how so many suddenly didn't care about the morals of a politician and other things we used to care about, it did damage my faith. I have always been more vulnerable than anyone knows, and I took it very badly, especially when those closest to me tried to silence me and would not understand my need to take a stand.

 I have been angry and bitter, and have been tempted a lot in the last 4 years to walk away from God and the church, and have been tempted more than ever to embrace these attractions and sexual desires that have plagued and hounded me for so long. I lost faith in Christianity, in the Republican party, in conservatism, in the church in general, and specifically the holiness church. Anyone who is very political at all and responds in any less than loving way to those they disagree with cannot honestly say they are being like Jesus, obeying his commands, and loving people as He said. Harsh? Maybe...but it is the truth. And yes, I include myself in that. It has all made me very angry and bitter, and the more people have tried to silence me and put me down as they praise and defend a corrupt billionaire politician, the worse it has gotten.

 I don't like who and what I have become.....largely because of politics. Granted, I have never liked much about me anyway..if anything.

 A revelation hit me a few weeks ago that I have been thinking on that includes a few thoughts:
God is not a Republican or Democrat. He isn't political.

I  may be human scum to Donald Trump, but not to Jesus.

God doesn't trash any politician and then expect people to not trash one he loves.....for He loves everyone and does not trash them. Even Pelosi.

God understands why I couldn't vote for DT. He isn't mad or angry at me for it.

  Maybe it is a good thing to lose one's faith in the things I listed. It has made me realize how much I need to change, and that no one is perfect and everyone is likely to let you down at some point. Even the church. But God? He never lets you down, and is always there. He is where our faith needs to be, not in political parties, political viewpoints, or even in a church.

  It IS sad that we let politics divide us....but I don't think the answer is for those you disagree with to be silent. We all have the right to our politician opinions and to voice them, but too many of us can't handle having our politics or politician disagreed with or criticized.

Jesus said blessed are the peacemakers. I am not sure it is possible to be political and be a peacemaker, or to love people as Jesus commanded.....so maybe we would all be better off backing off.

 We are supposed to be living and preparing for another world. America is not our eternal home, but I fear we almost tend to live like it is.

 Me? I am going to work harder at doing my part. That may mean un-following people whose social media posts are 99% political. (not much of an exaggeration)

 There is so much good we can use social media for. It is sad that so many Christians use it for politics.

An extra day

  Ever wish you had an extra day? If so, what would you do with it? Catch up on laundry and housework? Read? Binge on Netflix?

  Well, guess what.... you do have an extra day. We all do. This is leap year, a year when an extra day is tacked onto the month we are in, February. It is also the year that women are supposedly allowed to ask men out, instead of the way it has been done traditionally. That actually happened to me 3 leap years ago. I have no idea if it was because of leap year, but a young lady at least 10 years younger - possibly more like 13 - asked me out on a date. She even knew my issues and why I was single, and was still interested in me. Did I mention she was blind? Just kidding....but it was a surprise. And I said no, because I knew it would never work out.

  Four years ago, I penned (typed?) a similar blog about having an extra day. I decided then to do what I am going to do with my extra day this year. Seriously, if we have an extra day, shouldn't we do something different or special? Granted, the extra day is the 29th, and I will be doing something special on the 24th. And the 25th.

  The Amish part of Ohio is about an hour from me. Well, since I moved, it may be a little further. There is an inn there called the Dutch Host Inn that has what they call package deals during their slower times. The idea is to draw more people in than they would normally have. My one sister and her husband had done it a few times, and my parents also had done it. I looked it up, and the prices were for couples. So, I called and asked if one person could do it, and not only could they....the inn knocked $10 off for one person. So I made the reservation, went, and had a jolly time.

 The prices are different, depending on when in the week you go. Monday and Tuesday are $94.95. $84.95 for me :) - Thursday and Saturday are $104.95, and Friday is $114.95. The price includes one night's stay at the inn, plus a bunch of free stuff. I have done it a few times now, and I try to get there on Monday morning around 9:00. I check in, and get my packet of coupons  for places all over the area, covering different towns.

 This year, this package inclcludes:

 Breakfast at your choice of 3 different restaurants

Supper (or dinner for you odd people) at your choice of 3 different restaurants

A pound of cheese

A pound of ham off the bone

A loaf of bread

2 fry pies

1/2 gallon of apple cider

9 oz jar of jam or jelly

A bottle of BBQ sauce or seasoning

9 oz jar of Christmas jam

1 pound bag of brownie mix

a pair of socks

2 large sleeves of flavored popcorn

a personalized bookmark or pen

2 leather coasters

2 engraved wooden coasters

a kitchen utensil

a jar of mustard (yuk)

a ball candle

20% off purchase at a Christian bookstore

20% off purchase at Collectors Decanters and Steins (doubt I'll use it, though I did get a couple of magnets there once)

  Each of those items is from a different business. I have added up approximate totals, and it comes to more than what I pay for the room. Some things, I know what they cost. The BBQ sauce is $7.99. The two meals come close to $30. It is well worth it.

 I love the area, and am hoping the weather is nice enough that I can park and wander the streets of Berlin, my favorite town over there. There is a used bookstore in Millersburg, OH I discovered on my last trip over there, and I am planning on going there again.

 I always hit the majority of places Monday. You can't get in your room til 2, so I head back to the inn around that time. I relax, look over my treasures I have accumulated, then head for Mrs Yoders Kitchen in Mt Hope, and get their buffet......which has awesome fried chicken on it. I then head back to the inn and read and/or watch a movie.

 I get up Tuesday morning and hit the Dutch Valley Restaurant for their breakfast buffet. It is the closest of the 3 restaurants available for the free breakfast, visible from the inn. I then go out and hit the remaining places I haven't been to. The place offering the free fry pies is not open on Mondays, so I have to save it for Thursday.

  Maybe I am the only one who needs an extra day, a day to get away from it all. Life has been rough lately. My depression is worse than ever, and that is with medications. The way so many have acted towards me for daring to oppose a president with an R by his name has made it worse, along with the constant praise and defense of such a corrupt bully. No one may understand why and how, but the whole politics and Trump over Christianity and how people are treated has torpedoed my faith. People in my own church who won't shop on Sunday or watch TV, along with a lot of outward stuff, don't care about honesty and attack anyone who disagrees with DT...false accusations and attempts to squash freedoms of speech abound from those who are supposed to be like Jesus, but act far from it. I have no confidence in my church or its teachings anymore, and evangelical Christianity has been hijacked by politics and a corrupt billionaire. Christians defend and are OK with adultery, strip clubs, sexual assault, vulgarity, etc.....and even what Trump is guilty of but got acquitted for.....yet still rail against the sin I battle daily....and for what? False accusations and attacks on me and others for daring to hold a politician to the same standards they used to. Losing my faith in my church, its teachings, evangelical Christianity, and the Republican Party hasn't all been bad.....it has shown me that Jesus is all that matters. Being a true Christian isn't anything to do with my church, its teachings, American Christianity, conservatism, etc....it is about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. So many Christians in my life have no idea what I am battling daily. If they knew, I hope they would change and stop the false accusations and lies......but the blind loyalty to a corrupt politician is an obsession so radical, that I fear nothing would change. I have true concerns about how obsessed so many Christians are with DT, to the point that defending him is more important than being like Jesus and how they treat people.

 Didn't mean to get political, but that stuff is taking a toll on me, and getting away from it is important and necessary.

 I need to get away from all that. Yeah, I have un-followed a lot of people and political pages......but I need a day for just me that I focus on having fun and mental health. I love the area over where I am going, and I love to shop. Hopefully my tax refund will have come by then, which will make it even better.

 February 24th can't come too soon.