What it's like, introduction

  If someone had told me a few years ago that I'd be talking openly about my personal struggles on a blog where anyone can read them, I wouldn't have believed them. I was scared to death of people finding out. I knew I'd be ostracized, condemned, judged, and thought the worst of.

  Eventually I started talking about it more openly to the point only a complete nitwit wouldn't figure out what my long held secret was. 

 Then the day came that I as the world likes to put it, "came out of the closet".....only not as a gay man giving into his sexual attractions and desires, but as a very flawed Christian guy doing my best to live for God instead of those attractions and desires.

   No longer can I be silent, no more can I cower in the closet afraid of what my Christian brothers and sisters will say about me and think of me. This is too important of an issue, and there are too many hurting people sitting in the pews of our churches for me to be silent.

  I am going to do a few blog posts on the issue of same-sex attractions, and what it is like dealing with them. This is something that may make people uncomfortable, but it is something the church and Christians need a better understanding of, and is something we need to do a better job of addressing and dealing with.

    There are people who think I should just try to ignore this and not talk about it, which just shows that people do not understand it. A lady from my church blocked me on Facebook because I posted too much about it. Another one told me I may make young people curious and cause them to get into that sin, and that she thought I'd want to stay as far away from it as possible.

   Another friend yet was offended because her son deals with it and she took offense to any post that had a negative view of the issue and claimed I hate gay people... telling her I deal with that myself didn't change her mind.

   And another friend that stayed with me some years back criticized me for reading books on the issue of homosexuality and how to deal with it, as if I tried to ignore it, it would just go away.

 Others have the idea that I just need more of God and haven't prayed enough.

   To say that many in the church haven't got a clue about this issue is an understatement.

  A few basics to start out:

1) It is not a choice to be attracted to the same sex.

2) It is not a sin to be attracted to the same sex.

3) You can't catch it.

4) Not everyone dealing with this issue is marching in parades and trying to force it on everyone.

5) The chances of someone close to you having this struggle is very high.

6) Gay does not equal child molester. There are actually many more heterosexuals who molest kids than there are gay people who do.

7) Homosexuality is not the worst sin.

8) Homosexual is an offensive term to gay people.

    In these few blog posts, I hope to address the causes of same-sex attractions, what it is like dealing personally with them, and what Christians can do.

  For the sake of continuity and an attempt to be more easily understood:

1)  I shall use same-sex attractions, abbreviated SSA to refer to people attracted to the same sex, but not necessarily identifying as gay and/or giving into their desires and attractions.

2) Gay will be used to refer to those identifying as such, and who are giving into their attractions and desires.

3) Homosexuality will be used to refer to the sexual sin, not to refer to those engaged in that sin.

 This is my story, and the story of countless men, women, boys, and girls. We are your brothers, your sons, your fathers, your mothers, your sisters, your daughters, your friends, your pastor..... we are everyone and are everywhere.